


You know what they say.. Face your fears

by larryfistme



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Character Development, Dark Harry, Dom Harry, Graphic Depictions of Illness, Hearing Voices, Innocent Louis, Invasion of Privacy, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Mental Illness, Molestation, POV Third Person, Possessive Harry, Psycho Harry, Rape/Non-con Elements, Rimming, Scared Louis, Schizophrenia, Sexual Assault, Sexual Content, Sexual Fantasy, Stalking, Vulnerable Louis, Young Louis, and kind of kinky i guess, harry as a clown, harry as a murderer, harry is 18 gosh, harry lives alone, ikr thats new, im in no way encouraging a relationship like this, it may sound bad in the start but i promise it'll get better, larry - Freeform, larry au, larry stylinson - Freeform, louis is 16 omg, louis is terrified of clowns, lourry, my mind is just sick
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-15
Updated: 2015-05-25
Packaged: 2018-02-25 10:06:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 9
Words: 23,740
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2617946
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/larryfistme/pseuds/larryfistme
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>this is basically the introduction of the story :)</p>
    </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> this is basically the introduction of the story :)

Harry was used to hearing all of the stories about this 'horrible clown'. It was the top topic every student talked about. Why wouldn't he hear about it though? He was the clown after all. He would always react when every student told different stories about all of the murders that had happened during the last weeks and months in town. Most of it was true but it still shocked Harry about how small the town was and how fast everything spread.  
Sure, Harry wasn't the proudest person to do something so cruel, but he got this sort of satisfaction from it. Everytime he'd go out on the streets, dressed up in a horrible costume, covered up with face paint, he would feel this excitement flow through his body. He was always looking forward to getting a new victim with him.

Harry looked completely normal in the public eye, but he really wasn't. He lived in an old dusty apartment that was cheap enough for Harry's lack money. The previous owners didn't bother to clean up their mess and Harry wasn't complaining. Harry didn't care, he needed a place for himself. He couldn't live in a home with his parents, they were too much. Always so abusive, not only physically, but emotionally too. They always told him how horrible he was, how sick and filthy he was. Harry couldn't and didn't say anything back to them, mind you, at the time he was only a child.

It was probably why Harry had ended up like this, so 'fucked up'. Maybe that was why he took so much out on little kids. Maybe that was why he enjoyed getting his anger out on them by murdering them. Maybe he did that because those children had what he didn't have, someone who cared for them. If he had to admit, it hurt watching kids being happy and acting like everything in their life was perfect. Harry's was far from that. He was looked upon ever since his parents found their beloved cat in the backyard, dead. Even though he slaughtered many children, he never got caught. He would always wear gloves when he was wearing his costume which would prevent the risks of getting his DNA on the bodies that the police would eventually examine. Because of course, the police would find the bodies sooner or later. He would find a place to hide the bodies until the police found it, which lead to him having to find a new place to hide the corpses, obviously. It was fun watching the news though, it was quite entertaining looking at how the dumbfounded police wouldn't be able to find this 'mysterious' clown. It was a small town, was it that hard?

Harry could easily be described as an old grumpy pedophile if someone saw him during his night shifts. He was simply not the average teenager. It was purely sick for a teenager to even think of an activity like this. But Harry loved it. He felt relieved after every 'crime' he did. He felt so much better after slitting someone's throat open. Hearing the small victims scream and cry was like singing to his ears. He felt relaxed. He knew he shouldn't, but he did. He wanted to take all of this out on his parents, but it would've been obvious that it was their only son that massacred them. Harry didn't have time for jail or maybe even a mental hostitution. He didn't want to go there, he didn't need to. It was only waste of time.

While all of these crazy things are going on in his mind, he still feels the need to attend school every day. And he does. He goes to every single class and tries to have a bright smile on his face while he greets his mates. He may attend school, but he's not really present. If he didn't go to school, everyone would wonder what'd happened, and Harry didn't need people's pity or worry. He wanted to act normal for the people he wasn't planning on hurting. His best mates didn't know one single bit about what's going on in his head and he wasn't planning on telling either. The voice in his head is enough to tell him what he should do.

Harry spends various nights trying to lure small kids in, sometimes it can be hard work. He'll need to make a big effort when he goes in to character. He even went all the way over to a little boy's backyard to get him into his car.  
It was all very risky since the parents were home, judging by their lights still being on. They could've easily seen what had happened in the backyard when he basically started talking in his goofy voice with the little boy, telling him about how much fun it will be when they get over to his place. It was cruel to trick so many children like that, but the voice in Harry's head told him otherwise.

It was not until one night where Harry had dressed up for his clown character, looking for another victim for the night, that he saw a boy. This boy wasn't a little boy though, he was probably a few years younger than Harry. The boy was drop dead gorgeous, with his fringe covering his forehead, blue eyes hiding beneath the fringe with those long thick eyelashes framing his eyes perfectly. He had a set of high cheekbones that could cut glass if only possible. He started looking down his body and felt an urge to scream when he noticed how pure the boy looked. The boy screamed 'innocent' so badly and Harry just wanted to ravish him. It was unbelieveable how attracted Harry felt to this strange boy and Harry didn't realize that he was staring until the boy's blue eyes met with his green ones and the boy's facial expression was filled with fear.

Louis' eyes widened at the sight in front of him and felt kind of violated standing in front of this clown, staring him up and down. He couldn't help but gulp in fear as the clown started walking closer. Louis was scared shitless of clowns. He hated them with a passion, but feared them even more. He knew he shouldn't of walked out alone during this time at night, but he really needed to. He needed to clear his mind off of things. By now, he regretted it strongly. He could feel the clown's eyes on him and decided to try and ignore him by starting to walk in another direction. He started walking in a fast pace, wanting to get home as fast as possible. He looked behind himself to see if the man was still there and was relieved as he noticed that there was no sign of the man being there. Louis took a deep breath and chuckled lightly as he thought about how ridicilous he acted, it was only a clown damnit. 'Don't act like a child' Louis told himself as he started walking further down the street to later reach his own house.


	2. Chapter 1

It had been about 15 days since Harry saw that boy. Yes, he counted. Harry had spent many nights in the same spot he saw the boy but never saw a sign of him. Harry knew that the boy only lived a few blocks away but wasn't exactly sure where. He didn't feel like getting the cops on his arse for creeping around houses in the neighborhood. The boy wouldn't leave Harry's mind and it made him frustrated how he hadn't seen him in almost two weeks. He wasn't obsessed with him or anything. Not. Harry tried his best to track him down on social media but it obviously wouldn't work because he didn't even know his goddamn name. The boy even distracted Harry at school sometimes. It wasn't something new though, Harry never pays attention during classes. This was just so different. He had seen many hot people before, so this was really unexplainable and confusing for Harry. He didn't even know this boy. Still he felt his heart racing at the simple thought of him. Was he was lusting for the boy? No, that couldn't be it. Lust is mostly seen as a strong sexual desire, which Harry could admit he felt for this boy, but that was not it. He had hooked up with a few people in the past but he has never felt this attracted to someone. He had never felt attracted to someone like this, not even this sexually frustrated. Probably if he was drunk, but right now, he was as sober as ever.

Harry was lying down on his bed, looking up at the ceiling in his quiet apartment. He stared at the dust forming at the corners of the ceiling. He could hear his clock ticking through the immense silence and started tilting his head to the times the clock would tick. You know, a normal person would find this extremely boring and 'a waste of time' but Harry loved this. A place where he wouldn't keep hearing screaming voices that would tell him how much of a mistake he was. Well, not counting the one in his head of course. That one is a completely different one. Harry would hear that voice from time to time. Mostly when he was in hard situations. By that, it meant during his night shifts. The voice in his head would get him worked up enough to be contained with even more rage than he was in the first place. Harry didn't see anything bad about it anyway, at least he has a friend. Yes, that counts as his friend. He doesn't have anyone else that he would trust with his decisions and Harry's pretty sure that it's his conscious. He doesn't see the things he does as _that_  bad but he reckons that it could be a bit naughty sometimes. A normal person would feel bad about the bad things they've done in their lives and feel regret but Harry wouldn't. It may sound disturbing but at times he would eventually laugh at the things he did to those little kids. He isn't the only one laughing though, his friend is too.

Tonight was the last time he would try to look for the boy. He promised himself that this was it and he's good at keeping promises. This time he wasn't gonna dress up in his costume, he was going to try to fit in with all the other people. Not that it was hard, it's just that he's not the most comfortable in it.Harry feels kind of exposed in normal clothing. He would dress up in casual and 'normal' outfits for school but otherwise it was his dirty old clown costume laying on his bed, ready to be worn. Harry pushed himself off of the bed and walked over to his wardrobe. It wasn't full with clothes, hence to why he would wear the same clothes to school sometimes. He picked out his favorite pair of black skinny jeans and a simple white v-neck. He wasn't really stylish but at least he knew what he was wearing. He placed the clothing's on the bed before stripping off his clothes that he apparently forgot he had on for a moment. You see, Harry always walks around naked in the house. He quickly lifted his shirt over his head and threw it on the ground. Luckily he only had some loose jeans on so it was only to gently slide them down his legs and they were off. Harry managed to pick the clothes up again and hang them up in the wardrobe within seconds, wanting to put on his new outfit for the night as fast as possible. He was very excited tonight, he was making sure he would see this boy tonight. He grabbed the white v neck and put his arms through the holes before slowly sliding it down his head. He felt a strong and disgusting smell once he did and almost choked on his own smell. He walked over to his bedside table where he had his one and only cologne, sprayed it over his chest area until he felt like the smell of sweat was gone. Harry may be very responsible when it comes to cleaning up messes but that doesn't mean that he's going to be as responsible when it comes to cleaning clothes. He doesn't have a bad odor _all_ the time but he doesn't smell like flowers all the time either. Or yeah, when he takes a shower and uses his shower gel, but that's a different story.

He walked over to his mirror next to the wardrobe which by the way, was hanging loosely on the wall. He walked closer to the mirror and checked if he looked okay. He stared at his face as he made some odd facial expressions to soften his frown plastered on his face. Maybe his scars across his face were noticeable? No, that's ridiculous, his friends never noticed them and Harry knew that they weren't completely oblivious about everything. He sighed once he realized he was freaking out over this, this wasn't a date or something. "Get it together Harry" He told himself as he slapped his hands against his face as an attempt to wake himself up from whatever this was. Sadly, it wasn't effective at all. It only led him to look himself in the mirror again, trying to convince himself that there's nothing wrong with him. _  
_

_'Expect for all the homicide you've caused Harold'_

Harry frowned at the sound of his own friend talking. "Not now, I'm not in the mood for this" Harry whispered shaking head, trying to avoid his friend. He didn't need him now, Harry was for once, gonna try to do this by himself.

_'_ _Shaking your head won't make me go away babe'_

He felt like he was boiling with anger but tried supressing it. This was something he  _really_  wanted to do good, great actually. "Just leave me to think for myself for now, please this is important." Harry pleaded and looked up at himself in the mirror again. He stared at himself intensely and waited for a response from his friend to be heard but there was none. That was enough for him to confirm that he was alone for a moment, for the least. He ignored checking himself out for the last time and walked straight over to his bedside table to grab his notebook. If he was going to spend the night out, trying to act normal, the least he could do was write. He wasn't a poet but he would write down his thoughts down there at times. Not like a diary though, more like a reminder or something that's stuck on his mind that he needs to let out.

Harry walked out of his room with his notebook and pencil in his hand and reached his hangers by the entrance of the flat. He carefully placed his things on the floor and took the opportunity to grab his boots on the way. He easily slid his feet in his boots and reached for his black coat hanging in front of him right after. He hadn't worn this coat in a while. Harry kneeled down and picked up his notebook. He quickly ran into his room to check himself out one last time. His hair was looking fine, his long curls weren't too crazy. He looked really good in that coat, he must admit. He started fake smiling in the mirror to see if it looked good enough but told himself that he wasn't gonna be the sunshine in the room to make everyone smile either way. He went outside his room but grabbed his keys right before closing his door after him. Harry walked over to his front door and held his notebook firmly with his non dominant hand as his other one was occupied with opening the door. He locked his flat after himself and waited for the lift to arrive on his floor. Once he was outside, he immediately started walking towards his car. It was parked a few meters away from the building and it was great. He didn't like walking, too much.

\--------

Harry closed his car door after him as he walked out of his car. He fiddled with his keys for a short second before locking the car after him. He shoved his keys in one of his pockets and started strutting down the street. He was going to the café the boy was previously been standing very close to the last time he saw him. Harry didn't pay much attention to it at first, but the boy was literally standing outside the café. Harry had a strong feeling he was gonna be here tonight, he knew it. He walked through the entrance of the café and decided it was best for him to order something small and cheap. He was gonna wait for the boy to arrive and the worker's would've probably kicked Harry out if he only sat in there, not buying anything. There weren't that many people in there, probably about 10-11 people. Harry looked around the place to see if the boy was there. Not much to his surprise, there was no sign of him, once again. He sighed but shrugged it off as he walked up to the cashier. He shot her the friendliest smile he could offer as he was about to order. "I'll have some warm chocolate please" He said and clapped his hands together in slight excitement. He wasn't the best with social interaction. She nodded and wrote it down. "That'll be £ 1.60 sir." She said and waited for Harry to hand out his money. He started feeling through his back pockets until he felt a few pennies. He grabbed them and stuck them out of his pocket. He counted them in his hands and came to conclusion that he had four pounds. Harry sneaked the two coins that he wasn't gonna use in his back pocket again and awkwardly gave the cashier the money. She gladly accepted them and walked over to what seemed to be a coffee machine.

Harry zoned out for a moment, he didn't even realize until the woman started calling for him. "Hello?" "Sir, your chocolate is ready." Harry looked up at her and muttered a small 'thanks' as he took the warm chocolate in his hand and got the change in his left hand. He walked towards the nearest table and sat down on the chair next to it. He relaxed in his seat as he thought 'my warm chocolate won't get cold before he get's here right?'

\-----

That was where Harry was wrong. The boy wouldn't turn up and Harry started getting frustrated for spending lots of hours looking like an idiot waiting for the boy to arrive. He knew the girl behind the counter felt sorry or even embarrassed for him. Harry shouldn't of been positive about all of this. This was so goddamn stupid, Harry thought. He crinkled his nose as he looked down at his now _cold_ chocolate which was still not even touched since he ordered it. Harry looked around himself to see if there were a few people left. He was all alone, besides from the female cashier of course. He awkwardly stood up from his seat and carefully pushed the chair towards the table without making too much noise. He stared at the ground as he exited the café. He almost rushed towards his car because of the sudden feeling of humiliation. He was actually stupid enough to think that he would see this boy tonight.

_'You should of listened to me in the first place, prick'_

He heard his friend say. Harry frowned as a way of showing defeat because his friend was right, he should've listened. He should've listened to what he had to say. For once, when Harry decided to make this decision by himself he fucked up. Harry started walking towards his car and looked up from the ground. He searched for his car with his eyes when suddenly something caught his eyes. Harry froze in his steps once he realized who was standing a few blocks away from him. A female figure standing in front of a young boy which he recognized so well. They were on the right side of the street and Harry knew exactly what he could do. He stared a bit longer and saw them interact to be sure if it actually was  _the_  boy. It definitely was. He could clearly see his face behind the girl who was blocking Harry's way of seeing him completely.

Harry walked towards his car and quickly unlocked it. He got in his drivers seat and started the engine. There weren't many cars behind him so he could back his car up freely. He slowly drove forwards where _the_ boy and the irrelevant girl were standing at. Harry parked a few meters away from them. He was close enough to see the boy clearly now. He was wearing a huge gray sweater and some baby sweatpants. Didn't show off his wonderful bum like last time, but Harry didn't care, he still looked at handsome as ever. Harry opened up his window and tried his best to hear what they were talking about. Since Harry was parked on the left side of the street, it was obviously a bit hard to hear them. But after concentrating on the sounds they were making and making it into full sentences, he could finally understand things they said. Not everything of course, they mumbled a lot (which made Harry furious) and would even talk at the same time, basically talking on top of each other's sentences. It was hard at times but there was one special thing that caught Harry's attention.

"But it's your birthday soon! You've got to celebrate this Louis!" Harry heard the female burst out to the boy's face. Harry felt himself smiling once he heard what the girl had called this boy, now called Louis. He hurriedly took up his notebook from his pocket in his coat, which was very convenient by the way, and started writing down little notes about the conversation he heard.

_**'The boy is called Louis, by the way it's pronounced, definitely Louis and not Lewis'** _

_**'His birthday is soon, gotta find out when'** _

_**'How old is he? 15 turning 16? 16 turning 17?'** _

_**'Is he a virgin?'** _

_**'Where does he live?'** _

_**'Exactly which house? What room?'** _

_**'Phone number is important also'** _

Harry played with his thumbs after all the things he had written down and kept listening to the conversation. After sitting in his car for about 10 minutes, they bid their goodbyes and walked their part ways. That was when Harry started looking at the b-Louis more desperately. He was simply curious about where he was gonna walk. Harry's engine was still on so he carefully tried to keep up with Louis' steps as he drove slowly. He was not at Louis' rate, he was behind him, but he was definitely keeping up. When Louis turned his heels to the house in front of him, Harry stopped his car. He watched as Louis walked towards his house and just couldn't resist to look at his body. The way he was swaying with his hips as he walked was simply killing to watch from afar. Louis reached the main entrance of his house and entered. He was out of sight and Harry was sure he knew where he lived now. The only thing left was to know which room he's in. All of the lights were off, so the light in the room that would be turned on in the house, would be Louis'. Harry was sure about this. This time he was. Harry watched all of the windows on the second floor to make sure he didn't miss anything. Sure enough, a light was turned on a few minutes later. Harry looked at the window and was almost astonished at the sight in front of him.

Louis. Forgot. To. Cover. His. Window.

"Is this what heaven's like?" Harry whispered to himself as he desperately looked at Louis through his bloody car window. He watched as Louis stripped off his sweat pants and felt his eyes rolling back because fuck, his body was so gorgeous. The thing was, Louis wasn't even trying and Harry felt like Louis was intentionally doing this. Of course he wasn't, who would strip in front of a goddamn stalker? Next off was his sweater but for some reason he kept it on. He tugged at the material as if he was unsure but didn't attempt to take it off. Harry almost growled at this shit, felt like the boy was fucking teasing him. Louis was only in his boxers and sweater now. Sadly Harry couldn't see his boxers, his huge sweater covered most of it. At least he got to see his thighs, which he loved so dearly. Harry was feeling himself getting a semi in his pants and was almost ready to touch himself until Louis turned the lights off. "Fucking tease." He muttered as he started the car's engine again. He was gonna visit this place frequently now, for sure.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys are enjoying this story. I know I am. I think it's a pretty interesting plot and it's great that some of you agree :) I'm gonna try to update during weekends if that's okay. So yeah, this chapter is kind of short but I'm gonna try to aim for 2-4k words long chapters. Oh and thank you for the comments that I got on the first 'chapter' that I posted. I'm calling it a 'chapter' because it was really just the introduction of the story and not really classified as the official first chapter, but oh well.
> 
> Please don't forget to leave kudos bc that makes me v happy and even more excited about writing aye


	3. Chapter 2

Harry started off his monday as usual. His alarm would sound a few minutes before 8 so that he would get enough time to prepare himself for school, which started at 8.15. He stretched his arms once he heard his alarm and made himself get out of his bed. It was never a struggle, Harry would always wake up when his alarm sounded. But it was his choice if he wanted to stay in bed or move his arse. He tried shaking off his tiredness by slapping his face multiple times, jumping around his room and so on. It wouldn't always work that well, but hey, at least he got out of his bed. He walked over to his wardrobe and slowly opened it as he rubbed his eye with his right hand. He lazily put together an outfit that matched and threw it on. He usually wasn't his tired during mornings. He blames Louis for taking up his time. Harry had spent his nights cleaning up his literal bloody messes from his night shifts, you know, same old same old. But last night he decided to stay outside Louis' house, at the exact same spot. He didn't get to see Louis. Harry was almost about to go insane at the fact that he wouldn't get another striptease from the boy. He brushed it off when he noticed it was 3 in the morning and Louis was definitely fast asleep.

That wasn't enough though, no, Harry stayed up after leaving Louis neighborhood. He drove back to his own apartment and walked over to his laptop as he entered his room. He wasn't okay with not getting to see the precious little boy. He needed _something_. He logged into his computer and clicked on his browser once it started. Harry sat there for a while, thinking what he was gonna search up when Google had popped up in front of him. He looked at the search bar and thought carefully about what he was gonna do. He slowly tapped in Louis' name but quickly erased it, it would've been useless to just search up his first name. There are millions of people named that. Harry sighed and looked around his room. How could he find out this boy's full name and in that way, stalk his social media sites?

Harry sat there thinking about it until it hit him. Harry knew Louis' address, or at least the street he lives on. He urgently wrote in the street name on Google maps and looked at the picture of the street. He knew which house it was, he was certain. He clicked on the house he recognized was Louis' and found out the exact address. "You can find out the owner of the house by searching up their address right?" Harry asked himself. 'Of course you can, idiot' He thought to himself as he entered a site where the purpose of it was exactly what he wanted. He wrote in Louis' address and waited for the results to come up. Luckily it was only one name that popped up, instead of many. Harry looked closer at it and saw the last name 'Tomlinson' written on the page. Louis Tomlinson. 'An attractive name for an attractive boy. Interesting.' Harry thought. Harry smiled to himself as he successfully found out the boy's last name through the internet which he was so thankful for. "Thank you for helping me stalk this pretty boy" Harry said as he looked up to his ceiling as he clapped his hands together in excitement. Harry opened up a new tab and wrote in 'Facebook' in the search bar and was directly sent over to the Facebook website. He logged into his own profile, which he hadn't used in a while, and wrote 'Louis Tomlinson' in the search field. He pressed on enter and waited for the different profiles to pop up. 'He better be one of those boys who shows off in profile pictures' Harry thought to himself once the several profiles popped up. Harry scrolled through them until he saw a profile picture of one person which he recognized so dearly. 'Louis William Tomlinson'. "So fucking posh." Harry said as he clicked on his profile. He smiled as he noticed that Louis' profile wasn't private and could freely look through his pictures. He clicked on tagged photos and looked through them, one by one.

\-----

He had looked through all of his pictures, most of them were a blur because they were either, really irrelevant or just simply a family picture which Harry had no single interest in. What actually caught Harry's eye was a picture of Louis and another boy posing for a picture in what seemed to be girl coats. It was fun at first but then Harry started getting worked up about the fact that it was another boy standing next to _Harry's_  boy. Because he knew damn well that Louis was his. Sooner or later he was gonna be his. The picture was about 1-2 years old but Harry for some reason, worried that they still had some contact in some way. Harry hadn't seen the other boy, but he sure as hell was gonna find out more about him to make sure he stays away from Harry's property. He looked at the side of the picture to see who posted the picture and if there were any people tagged. Two people were tagged, one of them was Louis. Meaning the other guy was one of them. He clicked on the name which wasn't Louis' and was directed over to his profile. 'Stanley Lucas'. Harry already hated him. He scrolled through his feed and looked at his statuses. Nothing special was on there, mainly useless statuses about him hanging out with lads or something. "Fucking jerk." Harry hadn't caught himself frowning until his friend mentioned it.

_'Stop being a bitch over him having a friend and just deal with it'_

Harry raised his eyebrows at the sound of his friend talking and ignored the unnecessary 'advice' he got. "I'm gonna do something about it." Harry whispered. He knew that his friend would hear him either way because he could literally hear his thoughts anyways. He didn't get a response after, which he actually did expect, but it didn't matter. Harry was gonna do this on his own. Harry looked at the more specific info about Stanley, which he had forgotten to do with Louis, and looked at what school Stan went to. He didn't think much of it when he found out the name of the school. He copied it and clicked on his other tab where he still had Google maps up, and pasted it. The building which was supposedly a school, was in the same area Louis' lived in. "Great, he goes to school with this guy too?" Harry said and began feeling frustrated, there was no way he could separate those two. For fucks sake, Harry didn't even know if this boy knew Louis well or not. He didn't know anything about this Stan boy. He only knew that he wanted him far away from his Louis. As far as possible. He didn't know if he was gonna make it successfully happen, but he wasn't giving up on keeping Louis for himself. Even though he had to remind himself that Louis had no idea who Harry was, he still wouldn't stop calling Louis _his_. Harry wouldn't of called himself a possessive person, he usually wouldn't have any feelings for anyone at all. He never loved someone or simply liked them. He likes his best friends, but he wouldn't take a bullet for them. They're not that special. Louis though, he was a whole nother case. Yeah Harry would admit, he was attracted to Louis. Which was also something new. He felt as if Louis was a beautiful and fragile object which he needed to protect. Harry may see Louis as his property, but that doesn't mean that he only sees Louis as something he would use for his own pleasure. Maybe he would, but he wouldn't throw him away like trash right after. He would treat him like the royalty he is, he would make sure Louis feels as much pleasure as Harry would. He thinks Louis is special. Harry's not only talking about his body, no, he's talking about Louis' as in a whole. Harry has never seen someone _that_  godly looking, Louis could've easily been sculpted by the gods. Harry didn't doubt it at all.

Harry snapped out of his thoughts as he noticed his screen on his laptop turning off. He quickly clicked on his mouse to get it to work again. Once it did, he looked at the clock on the screen. '07:04' Harry's eyes widened. "Fuck." He muttered as he stared intensely at the clock, which wouldn't go back in time like Harry wanted it to. Harry wanted to continue doing this, but he simply couldn't. "No sleep for me then." He said as he closed his laptop and placed it on the floor before falling asleep.

That was basically what had Harry up the whole night. Harry walked out of his room with his jeans still not completely buttoned and walked into his small kitchen. He opened the fridge and took out his last old slice of pizza. He didn't mind it being cold and straight up ate it like that. He felt his stomach grumble at the feeling of emptiness even though he had just eaten a small proportion of food. Instead of making something to eat, he grabbed a pack of milk and drank right out of it. He filled his stomach with the white liquid until he felt better. Harry always had bad eating habits, he was always too lazy to make food or just simply buy it. No, he didn't have an eating disorder, he was just a lazy shit. He would never go grocery shopping and he would only buy food or drinks when his friends would come over. His fridge was literally empty if you didn't count his beer cans lying in there. Harry placed his almost empty pack of milk back in the fridge and closed it. He slowly walked out of the kitchen as he buttoned his jeans. He walked over his jackets and shoes. He picked a random coat that was hanging there and quickly put it on. He was always in a rush during mornings when he needed to go to school. He put on his boots just as quickly before grabbing his keys and walking out of the house. He locked his apartment after him. Once he was outside he started walking in a rapid pace to school. He didn't even know if he was late or not, he just wanted to get there before falling asleep in the middle of the street, falling face first.

He felt through his pockets as he walked towards his school, which was only a five minute walk to get there, when he noticed he forgot his phone. "This day can't get any better can it?" Harry said sarcastically when he thought about not being able to do anything during lessons today. Harry reached the main entrance of his school and entered. He didn't even bother to walk over to his own locker, he already knew what subject he had. Physics. He hated physics. It was definitely one of his least favorite subjects. Harry didn't have many favorites either, it was mainly the easy ones that he liked the most. Harry walked into his class where he was greeted by his teacher, in a not so friendly way. His teacher would always make snarky comments when he walked in late to class. So yeah, that was basically a confirmation that Harry was in fact late. It didn't bother him much, infact, it was completely forgotten when one of his mates greeted him, Liam. Harry didn't have much to tell about Liam, his grades weren't the best, but he always knew what to say and what to do in different occasions. Harry loved that about him. Liam was kind of a second parent, almost. It was cool to have a friend like that, you would never know when you'd need someone like Liam in hard situations. Harry kindly greeted him back as his teacher wrote on the board.

\----

Harry didn't pay attention to any of the following lessons he had that day, his brain was too tired to function correctly. His other two friends, Niall and Zayn, met up with him during lunch and they all decided to sit down and eat together. Their conversation was mainly centered around the subjects in school which Harry no interest in. He felt his eyes closing and his head tilting to the side as a sign of him falling asleep before Niall decided to poke his shoulder. "Ye can't fall asleep now, we have mathematics now." Niall told him, reasoning why he had just interrupted Harry's attempt at getting some sleep. Harry frowned at his friend and took a deep breath. Harry already knew that he wasn't gonna be productive if he stayed in school. It wasn't like he would find the cure for cancer if he left school, but he had better things to do. Louis was someone he would do. Yeah, he'd do Louis. Louis had filled Harry's mind in a matter of seconds and there was no going back now. Harry wanted to see Louis. He wanted to meet him. He wanted to see Louis right now. "I don't think I'm going, I'm not feeling well." Harry lied. He didn't get enough sleep, but that didn't mean that he wouldn't stay up a few more hours to see Louis. "Get better mate." Zayn said as he rubbed Harry's back. Harry slowly nodded and proceeded to smile at them as he stood up from his chair. "Thanks man, appreciate it." Harry said as he walked by the table he was sitting at and out of the cafeteria.

_'You didn't even say goodbye, how very rude of you. I like it'_

Harry half smiled at the sound of his friend talking and cheekily replied. "I've learned from the best." He said, gladly referring to his friend. Harry was already outside of the school building, on his way home. It wasn't long till he could see his own car parked on the street. He checked his pockets to see if he was lucky enough to bring his car keys too. Harry was thrilled when he felt his car keys is his coat's pocket. He walked over to his car and unlocked it. He stepped into the car and sat down in the drivers seat, obviously. He started the engine before driving away to Louis house. It took about 15 minutes to drive there but Harry didn't mind. If he remembered it correctly, Louis' school was only a few blocks away from his house. Harry felt his pulse rise because this was his chance of actually _meeting_  Louis. Not just seeing him from afar, actually meeting him and maybe starting a conversation with him. Harry drove around Louis' neighborhood to see if there was a building that looked like the one he had seen on the map last night. It didn't take long until he saw it. He started driving closer to the school building and decided to park his car which was supposedly for 'staff only' but Harry couldn't of cared less. He walked out of his car and locked it after himself as he stepped on the steps to the entrance of the school. He walked through the two big doors and was greeted by what seemed to be a receptionist.

"What can I help you with, sir?" She said and looked at Harry, knowing that he didn't belong here. Harry walked over to the reception desk where she was at and politely answered. "I'm looking for Louis Tomlinson, do you think you know what class he's currently at today?" Harry asked with a smug grin on his face. "Are you related to Louis? If you aren't, then I'm not allowed to give out information like this." She said and stared coldly at Harry. "I'm related to him." Harry lied and waited for the woman's response. She gave him a questioning look before asking more questions. "What's your name then?" She said and looked at Harry, cocking an eyebrow at him. "Harry S-" Fuck, he can't say his actual name.

"Tomlinson." He blurted out. "Harry Tomlinson." Harry corrected himself and tried sounding as confident as possible. The woman wrote down Harry's name on a paper. "And what is your relation with him?" 'I'm his fucking stalker, that's what I am.' Harry thought. "Uh, I'm his cousin." Harry said, trying to shake off his nerves. The receptionist was clearly not buying this but she gave in at last. "Louis is currently not at school, his mum picked him up earlier because of him feeling ill." She said and avoided eye contact with Harry. Harry smiled at the mention of him not being at school, that meant he was at home. He was at home with his mum, but that didn't stop Harry from thinking about going there. It would be easy, he could just tell Louis' mother that he's a good friend of Louis'. Harry could be charming if he wanted to, he was surely gonna be it now. Harry nodded at the woman as a way of showing that he listened. "How sad." He said but couldn't keep his smile away. He turned his heels and walked out of the school. Harry had no time for small chats now, not when he knew that Louis was at home and not at hell, also known as school. He walked down the steps and unlocked his car once he was near enough to see it. He quickly stepped inside and started the car. "You better be happy to see me Louis, I sure as hell am." Harry said before driving out of the school area.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry for not updating this friday/saturday but I was really busy this week. I promise it won't happen again. I haven't edited this chapter yet so I'm really sorry if there are any misspellings or anything grammatically wrong.
> 
> I hope you liked this chapter even though it was pretty boring but I swear, the next one is gonna be awesome. There'll be some special things happening in the next chapter, I'll tell you that ;)
> 
> Leaving comments and kudos is very much appreciated. Your comments on my last chapter are simply amazing, you guys seem to like this story really much by giving me such great feedback.


	4. Chapter 3

Harry walked out on the pavement and felt the cold breeze hit his skin, reminding him it was winter and it was getting colder. He didn't let that thought get in too deep because it was really irrelevant at the moment. You may wonder, why? Well, Harry was outside Louis Tomlinson's house. Literally outside. This was Harry's chance to actually meet Louis. He was most definite that he was gonna succeed too. He knew that he could be likable if he wanted to. Harry felt through his hair as he walked over to the main entrance of Louis' house. He looked at the wooden door in front of him and felt himself having problems breathing normally, which he hated. He didn't know why he was this nervous, it was only a boy damnit. Harry raised his knuckle and gently knocked on the door. He stood there with his hands in his pockets, waiting for a response. He expected Louis to come down with nothing but boxers on, but that was only for Harry to dream about. He knew that it wouldn't happen. Instead, the person opening the door was a lady which Harry assumed was Louis mother. But he wouldn't tell her that. "Hi! I'm looking for Louis, I heard he felt sick and was at home?" Harry told Louis' mother as politetly as possible. He wanted to get a good first impression, he was obviously not letting Louis' mother destroy whatever this was between him and Louis. Harry had already planned what he was gonna do, kind of. Louis' mother stared at Harry with a confused look for a moment before her face loosened up and her facial expression softened. "I'm sorry, and you are?" She asked and awkwardly scratched the back of her head, as if she was embarrassed that she didn't recognize him. Harry wasn't surprised. Atleast she was kind about it. "I'm Harry, hasn't Louis mentioned me? We're pretty close friends." Harry lied while showing off his precious dimples that many people seemed to adore. "Oh god, that's really embarrassing! I don't even remember him talking about you darling." She said and reached out her hand to Harry, which Harry responded with reaching out his hand too. "You probably already know me as Louis' mum, but you can call me Jay." She said and shaked Harry's hand gently. Harry smiled at the sudden kindness he recevied from her and took advantage of it. "Oh! I thought you were his sister. Silly me." Harry said and felt a smug grin creeping up on his lips. Jay playfully hit Harry's shoulder and chuckled at Harry's cheeky comment. "Funny one aren't you?" She said while smiling at Harry's kind way of showing appreciation for her. "Come in, Lou is probably upstairs showering. You can wait in his room if you want." Jay said and opened the door to let Harry through.

Harry smiled at her and quickly threw his shoes off, but placed them neatly where they were supposed to go. Harry looked up at the stairs in front of him and smiled delightfully, he was going to see Louis. Harry assumed Louis mother got a good first impression of him and that was even better. Harry started walking up the stairs with his coat still hanging loosely on his body when he felt the need to look down to see if Jay was still there. Thankfully, she wasn't. He didn't want to seem creepy or weird in front of his mother, which he knew he would be portrayed as if she was still there. He would most definitely start giggling uncontrollably at the fact that he would see the precious boy, which would look pretty weird in Jay's eyes. Harry continued walking up the stairs until he had reached the second floor. Harry knew very well which room Louis had, he knew what posters he had in there, what colour his walls were, he would recognize it right away. Harry was about to walk into the nearest creaked open door but was stopped in his tracks when he heard running water. Harry turned his head towards the sound of a shower running and looked for the bathroom which he knew that Louis was in. He tiptoed in the hallway as he inched closer to the closed door that you could clearly hear water running. Harry sighed when he realized he door wasn't open or at least a little creak peeking. 'No naked Louis for me', he thought. Harry turned around and started walking over to Louis' room, with his shoulders slouched.

_'You didn't even check if the door was locked you bloody idiot!'_

Harry reacted to the voice in his head talking. His eyes widened at the sudden interest his friend had developed in this but felt himself walking urgently towards the bathroom again. He hesitated before touching the door handle and thought about his options. If it was open, would he walk inside? Okay, he would. But what would he do there? Would he just stand in there and wait for Louis to come out? Maybe. What would he do when Louis came out of the shower? Harry had no idea. Harry slowly twisted the door handle and closed his eyes to listen if it creaked open or not. The door was open. Harry took a deep breath before going between the little gap that he had created. He didn't want to risk getting caught by making too many noises. Harry carefully closed the door behind him and slowly turned away from the door. He looked around himself and noted that this bathroom was definitely bigger than his own bedroom. Harry felt like a homeless person just by standing in this bathroom. Harry shrugged it off when he noticed he had been standing there without taking time to admire Louis' figure. Yes, his figure. You could see Louis body through the glass surrounding him in his shower. The fog from the hot shower he was having was the only thing that prevented Harry from seeing Louis' naked body. He wasn't complaining though, he would sooner or later see him naked anyways. Harry grinned at his dirty thoughts and walked closer to the shower. He made sure to not make any sounds by taking off his jacket which by the way, had keys that kept dangling in his pockets every time he moved. He placed his coat on the rug on the bathroom floor. Harry walked over to the shower and stood outside, waiting. He heard Louis singing a few ballads, which didn't sound bad to Harry's ears at all. In fact, he quite enjoyed listening to his voice. He wasn't a fucking opera singer, but his voice was definitely special.

Harry felt himself tapping his feet to the song Louis was singing to, but stopped himself when he noticed that Louis got quiet. 'Fuck' Harry thought. He held his breath when Louis stopped moving. He was probably listening if there was someone there. Which there definitely was. Harry started panicking in his position and swallowed the big lump in his throat. He didn't want to get caught this way, he didn't want to get caught at all. Harry just couldn't resist. His curiosity took over. He doesn't blame himself though, once again he blames Louis. He blames Louis for making him obsessed. Yes, Harry sees that as an obsession. He constantly wants to see Louis and the fact that he hasn't even _touched_  him is making Harry crazy. He didn't only mean it sexually, he also means for example, his face. He hasn't traced his fingers along his sharp cheekbones, he hasn't let his lips travel down his neck either. There are so many things Harry wants to do with Louis.

Harry was gone in his own thoughts and didn't even notice that the water had stopped running. He stayed there, daydreaming about Louis and his wonderful body, completely oblivious to what was happening. Harry was looking up at the ceiling, smiling at his thoughts. 'Louis Louis Louis Louis Louis Louis' was the only thing ringing in his ears. It was not until a loud shriek echoed through the room that Harry reacted. Harry widened his eyes at the sight in front of him. Louis was fully exposed, not a single thing covering him. Louis' face was almost completely pale, as if he had seen a ghost or something. Harry didn't even have time to process what was happening before Louis opened up his mouth to scream again. "Mum! Help! There's this ma-" Louis screamed but was silenced when Harry pressed his large hand against Louis mouth. Harry pressed Louis body against the cold wall and motioned with his left hand for Louis to keep quiet. Louis looked at him with just as much fear in his eyes as the first time he had seen Harry. "Calm down, all of this would've been okay if you didn't scream like a maniac." Harry whispered and rolled his eyes at Louis' reaction. Louis eyes looked glassy, almost as if he was about to cry. 'Oh for fucks sake' Harry thought. "I'm your friend okay? I've already talked to your mum and she seems to like me really much. You're not going to get me caught, alright?" Harry said and made a smug face after saying his last sentence before letting go of Louis face. He expected some sort of response from Louis but got none. Louis stood there in complete silence, eyes wide open. Harry looked at him for a while, wondering why he was like this. He didn't notice at first, but then it hit him. Louis was _still_  completely naked. He stared him up and down, admiring the pretty little boy's body and the pretty little face of his. After sensing Louis discomfort he decided that it was best to turn away. Harry walked over to what seemed to be the towels and smiled to himself. He loved Louis' innocence.

_'Just fuck him already'_

Harry felt his cheeks flushing and smirked at the dirty thought his friend was reminding him of. Harry kept his smirk plastered on his face as he made his way back towards Louis with a towel in his hand. "There you go." Harry said and placed the towel in Louis' small and delicate hands. Louis looked down at the ground and turned around so that he wasn't facing Harry anymore. Harry didn't mind the view, his bum looked even better from closer perspective. Louis quickly wrapped his towel around his hips and turned around to face Harry again. Harry half frowned when he covered his lower part of his body but turned his attention to Louis face when he spoke. "What do you want from me?" Louis asked, his voice cracking in the end of his sentence. Harry watched as Louis pressed himself up against the cold wall as Harry inched closer. Harry smiled at Louis terrified expression. "I don't want anything from you, as I said before, I'm your 'friend'. You're gonna tell your mum that my statement is correct, get it?" Harry said and closed the space between them. He placed his hands around Louis' hips, careful not to make Louis _too_  uncomfortable. Louis gasped at the sudden touch and slowly nodded at Harry with a big gulp on display. That made Harry even more intrigued to do what was on his dirty mind. Harry lowered his head so that he was at the same level as Louis, and placed gentle kisses on his neck. He started sucking on multiple spots on his neck, making sure they became bruises. He was not leaving this place without people knowing that Louis was in fact _his_. He started licking and nibbling on the sore and bruised spots and proceeded to smile against Louis' skin. Louis was lucky that it was winter, or else everyone would've seen it. It was Harry's intention though, he wanted everyone to see it. Louis' whimpers were the only things that kept Harry from going ape shit, the only thing reminding him that this was actually real and not some naughty dream. Harry placed his dominant hand on the back of Louis' neck and gently nudged his head closer. His other hand that was still wrapped around Louis hips, was slowly starting to travel further down, basically towards his bum. 'There is no going back now' Harry thought. He continued leaving sloppy kisses down his neck, also down his rather sharp jawline. Harry's mind was once again only ringing the thoughts of 'Louis Louis Louis Louis Louis'. He felt himself getting eager at the loss of friction which he never even had to begin with, and started rubbing their crotches together. Louis' whimpers turned into quiet moans, it was actual heaven for Harry's ears.

Harry would've continued but the noises of creaking steps getting closer got Harry to snap out of this 'trance'. He literally felt like Louis was the only one in this whole world, everything was quiet except for Louis' moans. "Shit." Harry whispered as he detached his lips from Louis' face. He looked at the door with his eyes wide, motioning for Louis to get what he was hinting at. Louis wasn't even in his right mind yet, he looked completely gone. His cheeks were flustered, his lips were even red and swollen, probably from keeping himself from moaning too loud. 'Naughty little boy.' Harry thought. Harry hadn't even gotten the chance to kiss the boy, properly, and he already looked completely wrecked. Harry didn't have time to give it much thought because sooner or later, those footsteps were eventually gonna stop and they were definitely on their way to the bathroom. Harry just knew it. Harry let his hands slip away from Louis and walked over to the door. He couldn't get caught now, Jay couldn't see Louis like this either. 'Fucking shit' Harry thought. What was he supposed to say? 'Oh your son needed some help in the shower so I walked inside to help.' No. 'Your son makes me horny and I needed to see him.' nO. 'Louis is in his room, I needed to use the bathroom right after him.' Maybe, but no. There was a pretty big chance that Jay would check Louis' room and if it turned out he wasn't there, everything would go in a downward spiral because of the lie. Harry couldn't and wouldn't let the thought of him getting caught even cross his mind, not now, not ever. Now was not the time. Couldn't she at least of let him touch Louis' bum and at least give it a light squeeze? He let out a frustrated sigh and continued panicking. This could not happen.

Harry hurried over to Louis and started desperately shaking Louis out of whatever this was. "Your mum is on her way here, we both don't want her to see us, right?" Harry said and looked Louis directly in his eyes. The realization finally hit Louis, he stared intensely into Harry's eyes and didn't even bother picking his towel up when he ran out of the bathroom in a matter of seconds. Harry took careful steps out of the bathroom and looked around himself. He was about to state the coast clear, but that statement was scattered to pieces in a matter of seconds. "Hello darling, is Louis in his room? I want to know how he's feeling." Jay, who appeared out of nowhere, asked. She smiled warmly at Harry and waited for Harry to answer, and like usual, Harry struggled. She didn't seem to be expecting an answer from Harry because she had already started heading towards Louis room. Harry couldn't let that happen. Harry ran in front of her and quickly spread his arms over Louis door. "Uh- um Louis said that he felt really bad and th-." He started but was cut off. "Then I have to see my little baby Harry." She said and pinched Harry's cheeks, as in a way of saying 'silly you.' Which he was not. "No!- I mean um- He wanted you to cook something to make him feel better, please?" Harry said but it turned out to be more of a plead at the end. She looked at Harry with a surprised expression, maybe because Harry was acting weird? Well in Harry's defense, this wasn't weird at all, compared to other things he's done. She raised her eyebrows and opened up her mouth to say something, but decided to shake her head as if saying 'no, that's stupid' and nod at Harry. "I'll make him my special remedy, he'll love it!" She said and clapped her hands together in excitement and started taking the first steps of the stairs to walk downstairs once again.

'That was too easy.' Harry thought. He turned his back to the staircase and walked towards Louis' room. He twisted his door knob and walked inside the room he had seen from distance for a while now. He looked around the room and thought 'This definitely looks different during night time.' which was stupid because Louis' presence wasn't even acknowledged, yet. It took Harry a while to adjust himself to the sight of seeing Louis' room like this, it was so much bigger than Harry expected it to be. Harry let his eyes travel around the room until his eyes landed on the beautiful boy that he adored, Louis. He smiled at the boy and started walking in his direction. He noticed that he was almost completely dressed, aside from a shirt. 'Of course he couldn't find one.' Harry thought, smiling at Louis way of not knowing what was going on. Maybe he was, but he wasn't doing anything about it. He had no idea what Harry wanted to do with him. Harry walked behind Louis and wrapped his long arms around Louis from behind, pressing himself closer to Louis again. "You better have a turtle neck in there, or else you'll have to face your mom with those bruises on your neck." Harry whispered in his ear and playfully rubbed his crotch against Louis' bum. He laughed at Louis' body becoming stiff in a matter of seconds and waited for Louis to do something, or at least say something. The only thing coming out of Louis' mouth was stuttering sounds, they couldn't even be counted as actual sentences or words. Harry let Louis out of his grip. He walked in front of Louis, towards the open closet that Louis was currently looking blankly at, and quickly grabbed a few out of the hundreds of shirts in there and handed them to Louis. "You either listen to my advice or simply wear these with a scarf on, which I'm not doubting you own." Harry said and winked at Louis. It was obvious that Louis was pretty rich, or in Louis' case, 'wealthy.' And who didn't have scarfs? Harry didn't actually like posh people because they would always act like total snobs, but he could sure as hell learn to like Louis even more than he already does. "I'm going downstairs to help your mum, remember what I told you okay? You're gonna tell her that my statement about us being friends is correct." Harry said and brushed his finger tip under Louis chin and slightly lifted his head up. Harry looked him in his eyes and made sure he had listened by receiving an urgent nod. He kissed Louis on the cheek before walking out of the room. Harry didn't even get to see Louis' face after kissing him, did he blush? Did his face turn as red as a tomato? Did he continue staying still, completely ignoring what just happened? Harry didn't know. He didn't actually want to leave, but by what he had seen. Louis would've never gotten dressed if Harry stayed. Harry made his way downstairs and grinned at his thoughts.

**'This was even better than I imagined.'**

**'I'll have to make sure we're more quiet next time.'**

**'This is _not_  the last time I'll see him.' **

And the list of thoughts continued. Harry was indeed obsessed with Louis, he was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is juSt wOAHH. Hope I didn't make you wait too long for this chapter to be uploaded, I spent lots of time writing it.  
> Once again I haven't had time to look through the chapter and edit it yet so I'm sorry if there's anything misspelled or simply grammatically wrong. 
> 
> Anyways, thank you so much for leaving so many nice comments on my last chapter! It literally means so much and it keeps me motivated to update this story. Leaving kudos is also lovely which I appreciate just as much. I'm happy that you guys are enjoying this story so far.


	5. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really sorry for not updating this weekend but hey, since it's Winter break soon and I'll have more free time, I'm deciding to update twice this week :)  
> Hope you're looking forward to that ;)  
> This is probably the longest chapter I've EVER written! It's probably about 6k words long so yeah enjoy??

Harry looked down on his empty plate and smiled. He was currently sitting at the dinner table and had just finished eating the delicious meal. He had stayed in Louis' house for many hours now and it was starting to darken outside. Jay had offered him to sit and wait while she cooked, but Harry being his adorable self, decided he wanted to help. She gladly accepted the nice offer and cooked dinner with Harry. Harry made sure to be extra nice during small conversations between him and Louis' mother. He was sure Jay was impressed of his gentle manners. Harry wouldn't occasionally do things like that to anyone, actually. But he would do anything, just to be kept closer to Louis. He had an obsession with Louis and it was burning with passion. He didn't want to leave Louis out of sight. Hence to why he decided to even stay for dinner.

So there he sat, staring intensely at Louis as he nervously shifted in his seat. He was picking at the small rests of food left and the actual fact that Louis was right in front of him made him baffled. He kept tugging at the material around his neck and gave Harry many glares as if he was saying 'this is your fault'. Harry wasn't bothered by it at all. It was kind of sassy, which he didn't expect from Louis by the judge of his character. Harry loved it. Harry just couldn't resist but to wink a few times at him, he knew that Louis was aware of him staring. Jay was sitting in the middle of the two, making them face each other as the table was rectangular shaped. It just happened that Louis felt the need to sit at the end of the table and Harry felt the need to do sit at the other end. Jay was completely oblivious to what was happening, obviously. That made all of this even better. Harry could do anything he wanted without Jay's consent. Which was great. Of course she would look at Harry or Louis questioningly but it would be ignored when Harry decided to change the subject to keep her distracted. It almost surprised Harry how well this went. He could've easily been arrested or something, if this hadn't gone how it did. Harry was grateful for that. Louis hadn't even mentioned a word about what happened before dinner and Harry hopes it stays like that. It's no one's business either way, it's something that should be kept between him and Louis. If it wasn't for Louis' mother, he would've already been pouncing up Louis' arse, hearing rough screams of pleasure escaping Louis' mouth. Because fuck, he would've enjoyed Harry inside him. Harry would've been moaning Louis' name as if it was a prayer, he would've tugged hard on Louis' bum as he'd thrust harder into him. There were so many things Harry would've done to Louis. It was almost unbelievable how much Harry craved him.

It was crazy because about a week ago, Harry didn't even know this boy's name. Now, he was inside Louis' house, plotting his way of getting to fuck Louis' senseless. Harry felt almost like an animal as all of these thoughts flooded his brain. He just wanted to touch Louis' body. He had already seen his naked body, which was a whole new level of teasing, Harry must add. He wanted to slide his fingers inside Louis' pink and puckered hole until Louis eventually begged for his cock. He wanted to hear Louis scream out his name as he would violently hit his prostate by every hard thrust, making Louis come closer to his orgasm. Harry just knew that Louis was a loud bottom, he could almost sense it. Harry bets Louis would wake the whole neighborhood up by his loud screams.

Harry felt his insides tingle. If he didn't stop his dirty thoughts, he would definitely cum untouched. He didn't want that, he needed assistance by Louis before ejaculating. Now that Harry was thinking about it, he was already rocking a semi. The only thing on Harry's mind was, like it has always been lately, Louis. Harry made it clear for himself. He would either get what he wanted, or he'd have to wank himself off in the bathroom later. He wanted option one to happen so badly, but he was going to accept the consequences if it didn't turn out like he wanted it to. Harry usually wasn't the person who would let himself get defeated. But if he messed up tonight, then that meant no more Louis. He would do anything to get a small taste of Louis and that was mostly why he was playing nice. Not only to Louis' mother, but also to Louis. Harry wouldn't of _only_ kissed Louis when he was practically naked in front of him. He would've ripped his own clothes off before ruining Louis. He wouldn't of cared if they got caught, he would've just continued with whatever he was doing to the pretty little boy. That was at least one reason why he was apparently playing nice to Louis. He could be nicer, but Harry likes it how it is. He likes being a naughty boy. It fits nicely since Louis is so bloody innocent. He loved the fact that he could make Louis tense up, just by looking at him. Harry loved the effect he had on him. Even though it wasn't near the effect Louis had on him, Harry was making sure it was gonna change soon.

As if Harry wasn't surprised, he had been lost in his thoughts again. Harry looked up from his lap and saw Jay standing by the kitchen counter, washing the dishes. He looked around himself and realized that there was no sign of Louis. He frowned at the realization that Louis had just left him like that. Harry slowly rose up from his chair, made sure it made a loud screeching noise as he backed up. He coughed awkwardly as he pushed the chair towards the table and took long steps in Jay's direction. "The dinner was lovely, thank you so much for letting me stay." Harry said and rubbed her back in circular motions. He didn't know when he was too affectionate or the other way around, he just hoped he didn't seem too creepy. "No thank you! It's been lovely having you as a guest tonight, Louis' doesn't seem bothered by your company at all." She said and turned her head so that she was facing Harry. She smiled at him before turning her head back to the dishes again. Oh how wrong she was. "I'm delighted about it, actually, I was wondering something which I may ask if it's appropriate or not." Harry started and nervously tapped his foot.

_'Don't tell me you're gonna ask her if you have her permission to fuck her son.'_

Harry cackled at the humorous thing his friend mentioned but quickly covered his mouth to silence his laugh. He murmured a small 'no' before calming himself down. It would've been quite weird if Louis' mother thought he was laughing at nothing, wouldn't she? No one hears Harry's friend and Harry knows that. Which is why he has stopped answering him verbally, instead he just thinks. Harry knows that he's in his mind, hence to why he doesn't feel the need to talk to him. He can read Harry's thoughts, so there's no worries. Harry looked down at the ground and waited for Jay's response. "Sure honey, what's on your mind?" She said as she turned off the sink and placed the last plates on top of each other, forming a pile. "I was wondering if I could stay here tonight? I just want to make sure Louis is okay or that he's at least having a good time." Harry chuckled at his last sentence as it could've easily been misunderstood, but kept his lips pursed to hide his smirk. Jay proceeded to dry her hands with the red towel hanging on the counter and just a moment later turned around to face Harry. She looked down at the ground, thinking about her answer before opening her mouth to speak her mind. "Don't you have school tomorrow? I'm sure your parents wouldn't want you to miss classes and I definitely wouldn't want to be responsible for that." She said and looked at Harry worriedly. She rubbed his shoulder and expected him to nod in agreement. But Harry couldn't have that. "I already talked with my parents, they said it was fine." Harry lied. He didn't want to spend his night outside of Louis house, looking through his window waiting for some action. He had the opportunity to do what he wanted with him and wouldn't let that go to waste. Jay opened her mouth to say something but was interrupted as Harry continued. "I can sleep on the couch, I promise, you won't even notice I'm here." Harry said and stared at her, waiting to get acceptance. He tried looking genuine and happy, but he had gotten frustrated at her for not agreeing in the first place. He knew that she wouldn't, but deep down he wished that she would just let him right away.

"Fine, I guess. I'm going to work a really long shift tomorrow so you two are gonna be alone for a while, please don't have a massive party while I'm gone." Jay said jokingly and poked Harry's chest. He grinned back at her and nodded. Harry liked Jay's humor. It was not normal for parents to be 'chill' or whatever you'd want to call it. At least it wasn't for Harry. His parents were the complete opposite. "I'm going to go and check on Louis, if that's okay?" Harry said as he slowly started walking towards the stairs. He turned his head and listened for her response. "Sure, don't keep him up too late though." She said and waved at Harry as he gladly bounced up the stairs in excitement. Harry was aware he wasn't a little five year old, but things like this were still new. Most of his partners were usually around his age rate or older, never younger. Dealing with someone as special as Louis, needed some extra effort. Harry was happy to do so, anything for Louis.

He reached the second floor and walked directly into the room he recognized as Louis'. He creaked the door open and let himself in, not even knocking before entering. He immediately locked the door after himself, not wanting to do the same mistake Louis did while showering. He smiled gracefully at his success of coming this far and turned around to look around the bedroom. He spotted Louis lying in his bed, hiding under his covers. Harry quietly walked over to the bed and looked down at the boy. He couldn't actually see Louis, he was literally hiding under his sheets. He smiled at the sight and started undressing himself. Not that he was expecting to get some _(maybe)_ , but he was not going to spend this time with Louis, fully clothed. Harry stripped his clothes off until he was left with only boxer on. Harry was still having a semi erection and it didn't seem like it would go away either. Not when Louis was in front of him. Nope, definitely not. Harry neatly folded his clothes and piled them on top of each other. He placed them by the door and then proceeded to walk over to the bed again. He lifted the covers and looked at the sight in front of him. Louis had nothing but boxers on, which made Harry even more excited. Louis was lying in a fetal position and almost looked like a ball. His knees were pressed up to his chin with his small hands pressing them closer as he peacefully laid there. That was surely gonna change. Harry climbed into bed and shifted closer to Louis. He heard the mattress make a squeaky noise but continued anyway. He shifted closer until he could feel Louis' devilish bum pressed against his crotch.

Harry groaned at the touch and desperately let his hand wander over Louis' body. He gently pushed Louis' legs away from his torso and rubbed between his thighs. He wasn't even sure if Louis' was awake, but at the moment he couldn't of cared less. He felt himself palming Louis' boxers, waiting for some reaction at least. He wanted _something_. Harry dry humped Louis' bum in desperation, wanting some friction. He grabbed his hips and started rubbing his cock on his bum in a rapid pace. He left tender kisses on Louis neck and felt himself growing harder as this all went by. Harry slowed down his pace and started palming Louis' through his boxers again. It was not until Harry felt Louis stiffen against him, that he knew he had awakened. That didn't mean that it stopped him. Louis let out a strangled noise as he realized what was happening. "What- I- Please sto- I don't-" He stuttered but was silenced when Harry shoved his fingers inside his mouth. "You're much prettier when you're quiet." Harry said and serenaded Louis with kisses all over his shoulders and neck. Louis made muffled noises and tried talking again, but ended up choking on Harry's fingers. Harry smiled against Louis' skin and continued messing with the poor boy. He managed to slip his fingers out of his mouth without hearing Louis' letting out a single noise and let his hand down to Louis' boxers again. Harry felt the fabric sit on Louis skin so nicely and couldn't help but to drag the elastic and let it slap Louis' delicate skin. Louis let out a small whimper under Harry's hold, which Harry loved.

Harry dragged the material down until he saw Louis' cock hit against his stomach. That was definitely an erection. "So naughty." Harry said before spitting on his hand. "Since we don't have any lube, this should work." He said before slowly stroking Louis' shaft. Louis gasped at the sudden feeling. Harry kept the movements slow and repetitive, making sure Louis enjoyed this as much as he did. He got a confirmation of it a moment later when he heard moaning coming from Louis, who had his head pressed to the mattress to quiet his moans. Harry pumped his shaft just a few more times until Harry got an idea. He pulled Louis' underwear down to his ankles and demanded Louis' to kick them off with his feet. Louis did as he was told and waited for whatever was coming next. "Lay on your back, now." Harry instructed. Harry shifted away from Louis to give him enough space when he turns around. It wasn't long till Louis turned to his side and was now laying on his back. "Spread your legs." Harry instructed once again. He waited, but received nothing but hesitation from Louis. His breath hitched as Harry ended his sentence and wasn't near the instructions Harry had just given him. Louis looked up at the ceiling in horror, not wanting to do what he had just been told. "Do. It." Harry said again, more aggressively this time. Harry couldn't stand Louis disobeying him when he felt like he needed Louis the most at this exact moment. Louis swallowed the big lump in his throat before shakingly spreading his legs apart. Harry took the opportunity to hover over Louis, making sure to spread Louis legs even wider in the progress. Harry kissed the tip of Louis' nose before going down to what he actually wanted to do. Harry let go off Louis' legs and looked down at Louis' exposed body. He looked down between his gracious arsecheeks to see, like he had expected it to be, his pretty puckered hole. Harry smiled at the sight in front of him. Harry looked up at Louis one last time before letting his saliva hit his hand. He let his middle finger go in circular motions on Louis' rim until he decided to stick one in. Louis' gripped the sheets at the cold sensation he was feeling in his lower area and let out multiple whimpers. Harry slid his finger in and out in fast motions, he most definitely didn't have time to be gentle.

\-----

Harry had all of his fingers in, pumping roughly inside of Louis. Louis had started bucking his hips to every fisting movement he did. He was literally screaming his lungs out every time Harry curled his fingers in his clenching hole. Harry was delighted by Louis' predictable actions and simply enjoyed seeing Louis in this state. He liked him quiet before, but hearing him wildly scream out slurred words in such a porn-ish way made it _so_  much better. "Please, I'm- I'm ready." Louis said, clearly begging. Harry looked up at Louis' face. His expression looked pained, his face was hot and sweaty, like the rest of his body. He was completely flustered. Harry wasn't sure if the wet stains on Louis' cheeks were tears or sweat but either of them mattered. The fact that Louis didn't know how hot he looked, had Harry astonished. Harry nodded at his pleads and slid his slick fingers out of Louis' hole. Louis gripped the sheets and clenched his hole at the loss of feeling inside of him. He shivered under Harry's touch as he lathered him up with kisses over his stomach. Louis shifted in his position and felt himself getting paralyzed. He had never felt this before. Harry felt the pulsing feeling pump through his cock and slit off his underwear. He could've sworn he had blue balls already. His cock hit against his skin and the look Louis gave him was enough for him to feel the lust for him grow. Louis looked at Harry as if he was about to pass out, but managed to keep his eyes open as Harry moved closer to Louis' face.

"You either get on your knees and suck it, or I'll shove it in your mouth right now." Harry said and gave Louis two options to think about. Harry stood up with a tight grip around his shaft, slowly stroking it as he waited. He stared at Louis as he rose up from the bed and was now standing in front of Harry. "Good boy." Harry said and motioned with his hand for Louis to come closer to him. "Get on your knees." He said as Louis had gotten extremely close to Harry. Louis' unsteadily got down on his knees and looked up at Harry. 'So goddamn innocent' Harry thought. Harry grabbed Louis' face with his bare hand and pressed Louis' face against the base of his cock. He felt Louis' lips against his balls and was almost about to faint. He had been so busy making sure Louis felt pleasure that he had completely forgotten about himself, which he now regrets. He has never felt this sexually frustrated before. "It isn't gonna suck itself." Harry said and looked at Louis with a serious expression plastered on his face. He knew he dominated Louis and he loved it. He loved the feeling of being in charge. Louis looked up at Harry with his big blue eyes, literally making it harder for Harry to contain himself. He waited for Louis to take his time to do this, after all, he was still new to this.

_'He better be'_

Harry flinched at the voice in his head. He rolled his eyes in response and thought 'Of course he is, look at this little twink'. There was no way Louis wasn't a virgin. No way. Harry became more aggressive at the thought of Louis already being experienced. The thought of him already been touched by some other guy. The thought of Louis swallowing cum like a champ. He didn't want that. Harry was his first, and his only partner. Louis was _not_  going to go around and flaunt his beautiful body like the little secret slut he is, no he was gonna be there for Harry only. Harry had already claimed his territory, but he still felt like Louis was new to the world. He was not ready to be greeted by all of the lustful men that only wanted him for his pretty looks. Harry must admit, he feels like a complete asshole and a hypocrite, but he doesn't mind it that much. Louis is his. He doesn't give a shit if Louis is already with someone, he was gonna make sure that ended, sooner or later.

Louis' lips started traveling further up Harry's length and Harry felt himself snapping out of his previous thoughts. Harry looked down at Louis' conflicted face, as if he wasn't sure if he was doing it right. Harry reassured him by giving him a smug smile. Louis looked up one last time before looking down at Harry's erection. He formed his mouth to an 'o' shape and carefully gripped the base of Harry's length in his hand. He gave the shaft a few soft strokes before deciding he was ready. Louis held his breath as he let his lips touch the tip. Louis stuck his tongue out and wettened the head before letting Harry's cock slowly enter his mouth. Harry moaned in response and thrusted his hips forward, taking Louis in surprise. Louis gagged, but managed to stay calm even though he just felt Harry's head hit his gag reflex. He hallowed his cheeks and bobbed his head on Harry's cock. Harry felt the urge to just fuck his mouth already, but kept himself away from his animalistic thoughts. He knew that it wouldn't be good if he did it. He let Louis go in his own pace and was patient, even though he had to calm himself plenty of times. The feeling of the tight suction around his head was enough for Harry to go crazy. Louis hadn't even gone that far down on Harry but it still felt like Harry was about to see stars any minute now.

"Look at me." Harry demanded. He knew that this was pleasurable, but it would be better with those big blue eyes looking at him. Harry watched as Louis rose his head up and looked at Harry with direct eye contact, with Harry's cock remaining in his mouth. "Try going down all the way, you think you would do that for me baby?" Harry said and patted Louis' soft hair. Louis nodded at Harry. He widened his mouth in preparation and slowly went further down Harry's cock. It took time to make sure he succeeded, since most of his attempts ended with choking. At last he managed to take most of Harry on his mouth, gagging the whole time of course. He could once again feel Harry's tip touching his gag reflex, but chose to try and ignore it. He hummed around his cock, making sure Harry felt the vibrations he was making. Harry surely did. "Fuck." Harry groaned. He expected Louis to be good, but not _this_  good. For fucks sake, this boy was probably 15 from what Harry knew. He hadn't checked what grade Louis was in, but he was pretty fucking sure he was around the age 15 to 17. Harry didn't even know what was right or wrong anymore, the only thing he knew was that this, felt _so_  right. Louis bobbed his head a few more times until he couldn't handle it anymore. Harry felt the suction around his cock decrease and looked down to see that Louis was breathing heavily. He breathed rapidly through his nose in an attempt to catch his breath but wouldn't calm down. "It's okay, just breath. It'll be fine." Harry said calmly but Louis didn't seem to listen. Harry grabbed Louis by his face and made him look him directly in the eyes. "Breath." He looked at Louis' face and waited for his heavy breaths to cool down. He kept direct eye contact with him until Louis' breaths weren't able to be heard. Which took a few minutes to establish by the way. He waited until his breaths were steady so that he could talk again.

"First time choking on someone's dick?" Harry said jokingly but received a very embarrassed looking Louis instead. Harry chuckled at Louis' rosy cheeks but decided that it wasn't time for being all cute and stuff. "So where were we?" Harry said, clearly hinting at the blow job he had gotten, which he thought wasn't done yet. Louis made a grimace in response before answering. "My jaw hurts." He said as he looked at Harry with a hint of pain in his expression. Harry felt some kind of empathy for him, which he figured out, he could manipulate. "Since you're already prepped, how about I make it up to you? Does that sound okay?" Harry said as he caressed Louis' cheek. He smiled warmly at him and felt Louis nod against his hand. "Good." Harry said with a smirk on his lips. He walked over to the bed and laid down on his back, waiting for Louis to come over. Louis unknowingly tiptoed over to the side of the bed and looked at him questioningly. Almost like a confused little puppy.

Harry patted his upper thighs as a sign for Louis to come over and _sit_  on him. Louis slowly made his way over to Harry and sat down at the end of his torso. Harry grasped a hold of Louis' arsecheeks and softly spread them apart. He made sure to massage the sides of his hips with his thumbs as he moved Louis closer to his cock which was now leaking with pre cum. He got his hand on his length and made sure to be gentle as he lowered Louis' bum down on his cock. His pre cum was the closest to lubrication. He watched as Louis squirmed in surprise. He lowered Louis' bum slowly and made sure he was balls deep when he had stopped moving. "So fucking tight." Harry cursed under his breath. Louis' hole was literally clenching around him and it was a complete hell to just be affected that easily by him. It was such a wonderful feeling. Harry could've might as well ejaculated right there. "Please move." Louis said, but it came out as a whisper. He was fascinated about the desperation Louis' had of getting fucked so badly. Harry felt encouraged to do this even more when his lovely partner wanted this so bad. Anything for Louis.

Harry held Louis by his hips as he slowly moved inside of him. He bucked his hips as he moved. Apparently that wasn't enough. "Please, move. Just do something, please." Louis' cried out. He looked at Harry with pained eyes and waited for Harry to make a move. Harry lifted Louis by his hips to adjust himself before continuing. He let Louis sink down on his length, then pulled out by lifting Louis by his hips. He kept it repetitive and made sure Louis went balls deep every time. He started off slow, but it proceeded to a faster pace a few moments later. Louis' quiet cries turned into a mixture of sniffles and moans which Harry enjoyed either way. He got satisfaction from both. Every time Louis would not so harshly reach the base of Harry's cock with his bum, Harry would almost scream out in pleasure. Which he knew he couldn't. He knew that Louis had already woken up the whole city by his loud screams and moans, but he would rather make them think Louis was just a horny teenager who had really much time on his _hands_. If you don't what Harry's referring to, then simply search up the word masturbation and you'll understand what he's hinting at.

Harry got more impatient as time went by. He wanted more. He didn't want to keep this 'playing nice' act anymore. It was almost as if he wanted his animalistic part of his brain to take over. He almost did. Harry clutched onto Louis' hips as he started thrusting roughly against his bum. He held Louis down by each hard thrust, made sure that he hit his prostate each time. Louis cried out in pain and let tears drip on Harry's stomach, but he didn't stop there. If he kept his thrusts uninterrupted, Louis would probably become even more of a mess. Harry smiled devilishly at his thought and gripped Louis' hips tighter as he thrusted into Louis nonstop. The sound of his balls slapping against Louis' skin echoed around the whole room. It sounded like angels singing. Harry had spent so much time making sure _Louis_  was enjoying this. He had never made sure if he actually was. Now he surely was. Maybe a bit too much, but he had literally waited for this wonderful moment ever since he had seen Louis that night. He had always wanted Louis, just as much as he did in this moment.

He kept his thrusts in a fast pace as he felt himself coming closer to his orgasm. He moaned out Louis' name too many times, he even lost count. He wanted to fuck him until he couldn't walk. He wanted to see him struggle walking downstairs tomorrow. He wanted to make sure Louis was gonna be reminded of the night before. He wanted Louis' so bad. It was funny because he was _literally_  inside him, but it still felt like it wasn't enough.

_'Greedy little bitch, aren't ya?'_

Harry furrowed his eyebrows at his friend. That comment was completely unnecessary, but partly true. No, okay, mostly true. Harry was indeed greedy, especially when it came to Louis. He always wanted more of him, there were just so many things he hadn't done with him. Number one on the list, being 'Eat Louis out' which he hadn't done. But he was most definite he was going to. Harry would get what he wanted, sooner or later.

Harry's thoughts were cut short as he felt weight hitting against his pelvis. He looked up and saw Louis desperately riding him, screaming every time he hit his prostate. Harry enjoyed the view in front of him and watched the 'show'. His hair bounced lightly every time he'd jerk up and down on Harry's cock. He watched Louis' stroking his length, making his face scrunch up as he neared his orgasm. His movements started getting weaker as his moans started getting louder. Harry took the chance to be in charge again and held onto his hips as he thrusted all of what was left in him. He heard the bed cracking by every fast thrust and just couldn't contain himself. The feeling was completely overwhelming and he felt like passing out, but it seemed like someone got there first. Louis screamed his lungs out as his cum splattered over Harry's stomach, confirming he had reached his orgasm. Louis was out of breath and decided it was a good idea to lay on top of Harry. He let out puffed out breaths as he laid there, with his face pressed onto Harry's chest. Harry pulled out of Louis' now _delicate_  hole and embraced Louis' small body.

Louis managed to smile in response and that was enough for Harry. He was happy with the work he had done on this beautiful boy. He was proud of himself for accomplishing this. There were so many kinky things he wanted to do with Louis and the fact that he did a couple of them in one night was simply astonishing. Harry looked down at the tired boy beneath him and smiled. He got out of the bed and made the bed for Louis. He placed about three blankets on top of Louis and made sure to tuck hem tightly around him. Louis was too tired to either protest nor react so it went by easily. "Goodnight Lou." Harry said as he brushed Louis' sweaty hair to one side of his fore head to place a kiss on his temple. Louis smiled weakly at Harry and drifted to sleep in a matter of seconds later. Harry knew that they had just had sex in his bed, but they could clean the sheets tomorrow. Harry grabbed his underwear, which were lying in the middle of the room, and quickly pulled them on to cover himself. He couldn't walk around naked now, this wasn't even his house. He needed to respect that. Harry walked over to the door and grabbed the rest of his clothes in his hand. He unlocked Louis' door and sneaked out of his room, as quietly as possible.

Louis should be expecting more sleepovers soon. Harry assures it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THE SMUT OH MY FCKING GOD. I think I need some holy water.  
> I guess the smut is what you get for being patient with me and not hating me for not being able to update last friday/saturday?  
> I haven't completely looked through this chapter so I'm sorry if there are any grammatical errors or simple misspellings.  
> Anyways, thanks again for the comments on my previous chapter, lovely as always. I love getting feedback from you guys, I appreciate it really much! It pleases me to know that you are enjoying this story so far :)


	6. Chapter 5

Harry could not get sleep that night. He simply couldn't. He tried his best as he turned sides on the couch, but none of it helped. Louis' mother had left him a warm and fluffy blanket on the couch, and Harry was very grateful for it. He would've frozen to death if it wasn't for that blanket. It wasn't that the house was ice cold, but Harry was only in his underwear. Which isn't enough to keep someone warm, is it? He even turned on the _very_  expensive looking tv in front of him and watched a few shows on there, but didn't feel his tiredness coming by. It was frustrating to face the fact that he wouldn't get any sleep, because of Louis. Yes, once again he blames Louis. He blames Louis for being his drug. Louis is an illegal substance, Harry's sure of it. He's constantly feeling like he wants more of him, even though he knows it's not possible. Louis has literally taken over Harry's mind. He feels like no beauty could ever compete with Louis'. Louis was the only one Harry could see. He didn't care about other people's appearances, they would never look as good as Louis Tomlinson. He knew that it might sound a bit over exaggerated, but to him, it was bound to be believed. He appreciated every single thing about Louis, hell, he didn't even know everything about him yet. He knew that he would though, sooner or later.

He had spent most of his night staring up at the ceiling. He had nothing else to spend his time on, or more correctly, he had nothing else he _wanted_  to spend his time on. He could've easily just stormed out of the house and left to drive to his own house. He could've put face paint over his whole face and jumped into his dirty old costume. He could've gone out on the streets, getting really hyped up before his committing next 'crime'. But he didn't want that. Not tonight at least. He didn't want to risk leaving the house, then not being able to get in there, ever again. Harry wasn't the person who'd get scared of things. He wasn't scared of things that any average human being would, but there was always this one fear he had, deep down. He feared rejection. He usually wasn't the guy who got rejected by girls, it actually never happened. It in some way altered his ego, but it didn't make him forget the rejection he got from his parents. The feeling of getting rejected by some stupid crush, was nothing compared to getting rejected by your own family. The feeling of not having a shoulder to cry on, not having someone who'd tell you that they love you, not having anyone at all really. It hurt. Harry didn't want that to happen with Louis. He knew that he had practically sexually assaulted Louis that night, but he felt like Louis would take any opportunity to leave him.

_'Of course he would, you fucking raped him.'_

Harry angrily slapped himself and furrowed his eyebrows. Harry was indeed a disgrace. The thought of Louis leaving him, or doing anything at all to make him go away, made Harry's heart shatter. Louis literally had Harry in his palm, it was his choice if he wanted to let go. It was crazy how fast Harry had developed these thoughts and _feelings_  for Louis. Which was completely new to Harry. He had never felt like this for anyone, actually. He had never felt the need of having to see someone constantly, neither had he ever felt the need of refreshing someone's social media sites frequently.

It didn't hit him that he hadn't gotten any sleep at all until footsteps were heard. At first he'd gotten delighted about it because it could've been _Louis_  but he got proven wrong. He glanced over at the figure walking around the first floor whom he by the way saw blurriedly, and didn't recognize it as Louis. He sighed when he realized that it was Jay, probably preparing herself before leaving for work. Harry wanted to get out of this goddamn couch and do something, but it was better to wait for Jay to leave. Harry patiently waited for her to stop walking around the surprisingly big house and leave.

It took a while, but the main door was eventually opened and later on closed. Harry listened just a few seconds more to be sure that the coast was clear. 'Coast clear' He stated for himself. He pushed the blanket away from his body and stood up from the couch. He quickly got a hold of the blanket and neatly folded it. Harry was used to cleaning up his messes, this was a habit he couldn't stop. He placed the blanket exactly where Jay had placed it the night before and walked out of the living room. He walked around the house freely and smiled in bliss. He was _only_ with Louis now. It was Harry and Louis. All for themselves. How wonderful. Harry wandered over to the stairs and sprinted upstairs. It was ridiculous to do so, but Harry didn't care. He reached the second floor and quietly stepped over to Louis' room. Harry had no idea what time it was, he didn't want to wake Louis up either way. He twisted the door knob and peeked through the small opening he had created. He looked down at Louis' sleeping form and decided to walk inside. He slipped through the small space he created and closed the door after himself. Harry looked around the room, trying to find a clock to keep track of the time. The only thing he was aware of, was that the sun hadn't risen. It was still pretty dark outside. Harry could see almost everything in the room though, the glim light from the moon made sure he could see more clearly.

Harry came to the conclusion that Louis didn't have a clock in his room, which made Harry surprised since he expected Louis to have everything. Yes, Harry kind of assumed that Louis was rich, but he still thought that it was common to have a clock in your room. Apparently not. Harry walked over to what seemed to be a chair, grabbed it and got a hold of a cushion which was lying in the middle of the room on the way. He walked over to the side of Louis' bed with his hands full. He carefully placed the chair on the floor and he placed the pillow on top of it right after. Harry looked down at the chair one last time before sitting down. His view in front of him was Louis' pretty little face. Or almost. He couldn't see every single contour of his face and a little part of his face was covered by the blanket he was unknowingly hiding beneath. Harry was very comfortable in his seat.

\----

Harry felt a smirk forming on his lips as he noticed Louis slowly blinking his eyes open. Yes, he had stared at him the whole night. Not one single thing kept him distracted aside from Louis. He had looked at every single movement he did during his sleep. The way he unconsciously let out adorable squeaks as he stretched in his sleep. Everything. Harry noted every single thing he did. The shining light from the sunrise made Louis appear godlike, he was literally glowing. He stared intensely at Louis as he awakened. Louis hadn't noticed Harry's presence at first, but was stunned when he saw him less than a meter away from him. Harry watched as Louis' eyes widened when his eyes met with Harry's. Harry still had his smirk plastered on his lips as Louis looked petrified. It was purely satisfying for Harry to look at Louis while he was acting like that. Harry enjoyed it, almost too much.

"You've got to stop doing that, it's creepy." Louis' snapped. Harry raised his eyebrows in surprise but was morbidly amused by Louis' sudden sass. It was quite attractive for such an innocent looking boy like Louis. "What is it that I need to stop doing?" Harry said, avoiding the obvious. He knew what Louis was referring to, but wanted to play dumb for the sake of amusement. He watched Louis frowning at Harry before letting out a big sigh. He looked at Harry with a keen expression on his face. "Stop staring at me." He said and turned around, making sure Harry couldn't see his face anymore. Harry smiled joyously at Louis before giving him his smug answer. "Oh baby, I've been looking at you the whole night." Harry said, now grinning. Louis shivered in response and tried acting like he hadn't what he had just been told. "Where is my mum? Isn't she supposed to stay with me?" Louis said, subtly changing the subject. He was still not facing Harry but it didn't bother Harry that much. "She's at work, besides, shouldn't you be old enough to take care of yourself? What are you, five?" Harry said jokingly but was also hinting for Louis to reveal his age. He still had no idea how old Louis actually was. Louis turned over to his side, to face Harry again, before speaking again. "Actually, I'm sixteen in a few weeks, so you're wrong." Louis said and Harry could've sworn that he might as well would've snapped his fingers too. He obviously didn't but it was a nice thought.

_'You had sex with a 15 year old. **Fifteen**.'_

Harry pursed his lips when he heard his friend talking. He gulped nervously when he came to the realization that he took a _fifteen_  year olds virginity. _Fifteen_. Harry coughed awkwardly and looked down at the ground to let the immense silence fill the room. He knew that Louis was young, but he wished that he was closer to his own age. Louis was turning sixteen this year, which meant that he was only two years younger than Harry. It was still very staggering.

"My bum hurts." Louis cried out when he tried getting out of the multiple blankets tucked around him. Harry had made sure Louis was wrapped up like a burrito. So it was almost impossible to get out of the mess. Harry snapped out of his thoughts when the sounding of Louis' voice was heard and listened closely to what he had just said. He smiled at Louis' pained expression. "Don't worry, it'll be over in a few days or so." Harry said and helped Louis out of the three blankets he was surrounded by. Louis was about to let out a sigh of relief, but regretted it immediately when he felt air hitting his lower region. He panicked when he noticed that he was _still_  naked and turned to his side. He made sure his face was buried deep in his cushion, hidden, just like he did with the rest of his body. There was no single thing covering him since Harry had helped him getting the blankets off of him. He regretted it strongly. This was a whole new level of embarrassment for Louis. "Oh come on, I've already seen you naked. Nothing to be ashamed of." Harry said as he leaned over, kissing the top of Louis' head. Louis didn't respond and kept lying there, with his breaths intensely deep. Harry took his time to stare at the wonderful curvy body Louis was blessed with. His bum looked deliciously plump and round, which made Harry want to tear his hair out. "You better put some underwear on, I can't stop staring at your bum for christ's sake." Harry said truthfully. He simply wanted Louis to react. Louis turned his face towards Harry and looked pleadingly at him. 'So adorable.' Harry thought. "I'll be downstairs making breakfast, you better hurry up." Harry said and left Louis with a wink before exiting the room.

\-----

Louis walked into the kitchen limping. Harry had delightfully slapped his bum once Louis walked past him and couldn't help but chuckle at Louis' flushed cheeks. Harry had cooked him eggs with bacon, which he was sure every single person on earth liked. Louis spent his time eating his breakfast sitting in Harry's lap. Harry had literally grasped Louis by his hips and made him sit down on his crotch. Harry didn't want to make the situation sexual, he just wanted Louis near him, as near as possible.

The rest of the day went by pretty fast. The first thing they did after breakfast was to put the dirty sheets in the washer, which Louis had to show where it was. It was lovely watching Louis struggle to reach the detergent, which he needed to wash the fabric they had put in the washer. Harry easily grabbed the things Louis needed and helped Louis in the progress. But that wasn't enough for Harry. Harry started voluntarily carrying Louis everywhere in the house, making sure his baby was okay. Louis had protested plenty of times, but Harry refused to listen. Plus, Harry was bigger and much stronger than Louis. Louis had nothing he could do about it. He had to accept the fact that Harry was a clingy person.

At one point they were even watching a movie. Harry had no interest in the movie but didn't say anything about it because Louis seemed to like it. Louis was once again sitting on Harry's lap and Louis didn't seem _too_  bothered by it. It happened in a few occasions that Harry would place wet kisses on Louis' neck, which would eventually turn into some hot tongue on tongue action a few moments later. Harry must admit, he adored the fact that Louis melted into the kisses they shared, just as much as Harry did. So yeah, instead of watching the rest of the movie that they were showing on tv, they decided to make out. Louis' soft lips brushing against his own, was something he would always prefer over something else.

\-----

Harry grunted against Louis' lips when he noticed the sun had gone down. That meant Harry had to leave soon. Louis' mother would _not_  let Harry stay another night in this house, it would get suspicious if he would have the permission to miss so many schooldays. It was only two days, but you can miss really much in those two days. Not that Harry cared about school, he just thought about how Jay would see the situation. Louis let go off their kiss and looked questioningly at Harry, tilted his head to the side, as if asking 'What's wrong?'. "I have to leave soon, your mother won't let me stay any longer than this." Harry said, pouting his lower lip. He caressed Louis' cheek in admiration as he watched Louis open his mouth to answer. Instead, the only thing coming out of Louis' mouth was a strangled noise. Harry smiled at Louis loss of words. He proceeded to keep Louis pressed tight on top him and stood up, having Louis pressed up against his chest. He was holding him by his bum, which was _very_  close to Harry crotch. "Can you believe that I could fuck you in this position?" Harry said cheekily. He felt Louis shiver through his whole body and almost laughed at how adorable he was. "Oh god." Louis whispered loud enough for Harry to hear and Harry just couldn't help but giggle. He placed Louis on the couch before reaching for his own clothes that he had left on the floor the night before. He unfolded his clothes and quickly jumped into his jeans, which he knew took the longest time to put on. Next thing was his shirt. He slid the shirt over his head and through his arms effortlessly and was fully dressed within seconds. He looked down at Louis who was now staring at Harry but nudged his head away when he got caught. Did he actually think that Harry didn't notice? How cute.

"Shouldn't I get a goodbye kiss?" Harry said and gently tugged at Louis' arm to make him stand up. Louis stayed in his position and decided to pout his lips for Harry instead. Harry delightfully accepted the kiss that Louis was offering. "Thanks for that one, but I'm expecting a goodbye kiss by the main door." Harry said smugly. He watched as Louis rolled his eyes, following with a light chuckle escaping Louis' mouth. Harry reached out his hand for Louis and Louis gladly accepted the nice offer by taking his hand.

They walked over to their shoes and jackets. It hadn't hit Harry until he felt through the jackets that his own coat was _still_  in the bathroom. He sighed at the realization and quickly turned his heels to go upstairs. "I'm gonna go and crab my coat, I'll be down in a matter of seconds." He said and got a nod from Louis as a response. Harry ran up the stairs until he had finally reached the second floor. He quickly walked over to the bathroom he now remembered as the room he had first seen Louis naked. What? It was a special moment. Don't judge him. Harry walked inside and urgently grabbed the coat that was lying on the ground, making sure to put it on as he walked out of the room. His coat was once again hanging loosely on his body, which it was supposed to. He was about to walk downstairs again, but stopped himself in his tracks. He needed to keep contact with Louis, in some kind of way. He sprinted over to Louis room and managed to not make too much noise as he almost kicked the door open. He searched around the room with his eyes to find some kind of cellphone. Yes, Harry was desperate. Harry was making sure to get Louis' number. At last he saw something which seemed to look like an iPhone. He smiled graciously and hurried over to the phone lying on Louis' drawer. "You better not have a password." He told the phone as he let his thumb slide on Louis' phone, attempting to unlock it. Harry scrunched his nose when it turned out he had a password. "Bastard." Harry said and became infuriated. This was not fair. He wanted Louis' number.

_'Call yourself through emergency call, thank me later.'_

Harry immediately clicked on the 'Emergency call' option and smiled at his friend for being clever about this. He could freely write in his own number and call himself. Genius! Harry dialed his own number and was calling himself a moment later. He knew that he couldn't answer because he didn't even bring his phone with him, but at least he would get a missed call. He waited a few seconds to let the phone ring and hung up after. He smiled at his success and placed the phone back where it originally was. He stormed out of Louis' room with a big grin plastered on his face. He didn't bother to close the door after him, he was leaving anyways. Harry bounced down the stairs in exhilaration and watched as Louis stood there, waiting for him. Harry hadn't acknowledged it before, but Louis was still in his underwear, _only_. Harry must've gotten really used to seeing Louis like that huh?

"That took more than 'a matter of seconds'." Louis said and cocked an eyebrow at him. Harry got down on his knees and reached for his shoes before answering. "Sorry, was just making sure I have your number." Harry said truthfully, his grin reappearing. He slipped his feet inside his boots and made sure they were sitting firmly. Harry stood up from his crouching position and was met with Louis surprised expression. He gasped as if he didn't believe what he had just heard. "I don't even know your name." Louis said, almost protesting against Harry's actions, which he had already done. Harry was confused for a moment, because how the hell didn't he know his name? What kind of degradation was this? Then Harry remembered.

They hadn't even had a fair introduction. Yeah, Harry already knew about Louis. But Harry only introduced himself to Louis' mother and not _Louis_. "Right! Um my name's Harry." He said and reached out his hand for Louis, acting like a real gentleman. Louis giggled at Harry's horrible introduction and shook Harry's much larger hand. "Good to know." Louis said, his gorgeous smile showing. They let go off each others hands when they decided it was time to bid their goodbye's. Harry let his hands firmly touch Louis' hips as he lowered his head to be at the same eye level as Louis. He leaned in and felt the soft feeling of affection as their lips touched. Harry loved this so much. So damn much. He was sure he could stay like this his entire life. The feeling of warm embrace as they let their lips slowly brush against each other, was a mesmerizing feeling for Harry. 

Louis let his lips detach from Harry's as he took a big breath. Harry looked down at him and smiled, giving his bum a light squeeze before walking towards to the door, also known as the main door of the house. He twisted the door knob to leave, but stopped himself to say one last thing. "I'll text you when I get home, make sure you'll answer alright?" Harry said and waited for Louis to respond. "Alright, _Harry_." Louis said and Harry couldn't help but feel a wide smile taking over his face. This boy was surely gonna make Harry even more insane than he already was.

\----

_**Hellooo xx** _

_Hi :)_

_**No kisses? That's a bit rude isn't it? x** _

_Sorry xx_

**_You're forgiven. Now send me nude pics xxx_ **

**_I'm kidding!!_ **

**_Only if you want to though xx_ **

_Mm :)_

**_Is that a yes? x_ **

_Nope :)_

**_:(_ **

_**Well goodnight babe, sweet dreams xx** _

_Night x_

Harry smiled at the cute conversation he just had with Louis. It was quite cute wasn't it? Harry thought so at least. Harry had kind of lied to Louis though, he wasn't going to bed. He was not going to sleep at all actually.

He looked himself in the mirror, smiling at how good he had put his face paint on tonight. It looked on point. Harry almost didn't recognize himself with his red wig on, nother than less with his costume on. Harry was indeed back on track and was ready to do what he was best at.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OooOoo the twist at the end. bUT OMG LOUIS IS 15. Yeah I know that in the tags it says 16 but he's turning 16 so that's why I said it like that. 
> 
> Aye sorry if this chapter was boring, it was mainly a filler for the upcoming chapters which I promise are going to be more interesting. If there's a word that I've repeated and used too much, then I'm really sorry. I tend to do that really often and it's quite annoying.
> 
> Oh and OMG IM SO CLOSE TO GETTING 100 KUDOS!! Thank you guys so much for the support so far :) It literally makes my day to know that people are reading this story and enjoying it.
> 
> As always, comments are always appreciated and they make me even more excited about updating this story. I read every single one of them c:
> 
> Love you guys :)


	7. Chapter 6

It had been exactly 4 days since Harry lastly saw Louis. He tried, he really tried seeing Louis again. But his mates kept him busy by coming over to his house, very unexpectedly. They arrived outside of his apartment a few hours before midnight, which was almost ridiculous. Harry would've enjoyed their company more if they actually told him that they were gonna come uninvited to his apartment. If he knew, he would've bought some food, maybe cleaned the house a bit better and I don't know, maybe put away his lubrication and tissues? Harry wasn't shy when it came to stuff like that, but it was pretty embarrassing to have to face the lads in the middle of trying to get hard. And of course, they decided they wanted to sleep in his apartment for the night. Which Harry thought was ridiculous because his apartment was tiny. Even Harry himself admitted it.

The reason the boys started coming over by his house more often or just simply inviting him over to their house was because of the christmas holidays. Yeah you guessed it, they just got out of school for winter break. Harry never complained though, it was just more possible for him to make effort into his clown character. He usually only had time to do such things during weekends, sometimes schooldays. But now that Louis had walked into his life, the time started lacking. Harry had stopped feeling _too_  infuriated at stuff and managed to keep calm in situations where he would normally throw a tantrum. He couldn't say that he didn't have anger issues anymore, because he surely did. He simply didn't feel the need to be angry, he thought about Louis instead. Louis could make Harry's dark mind bright for a moment. His thoughts used to be filled with horrible thoughts, mostly about his own parents. Harry knew deep down that he would never do such cruel things to his parents, but it would happen in a few occasions that it would appear in his mind. He would never commit to it though, he never let it be some mission he would do sooner or later. He knew that he hated his parents, but Harry wouldn't go that far and torture them. Maybe if his friend was the one with the decision, but he wasn't.

"Mate, are you even listening?" Niall said as he waved his hand in front of Harry's face to wake him up from his thoughts. Harry widened his eyes in surprise and looked at the blonde questioningly. "Sorry, what?" Harry said and looked around himself to see that all of the boys were now looking at him. Liam and Zayn were sitting on the sofa while Niall was still right in front of Harry. "Who's gonna sleep on the couch and where are the rest of us gonna sleep?" He said and put his right hand on hip, cocking an eyebrow at Harry. Harry scratched the back of his head as he thought about the question he just got asked. The lads didn't seem to take a 'no' as an answer when it came to sleeping over so Harry had no choice but to make up some space for them. But where were they supposed to sleep? Harry didn't know actually. Maybe in his own bed? Could they all fit in his small bed? Okay the bed wasn't small, but Harry considered it as small ever since he stepped inside Louis' bedroom. Louis' house was almost like a mansion compared to Harry's shitty apartment.

"You can all try to fit in my bed while I sleep on the couch?" Harry said as Niall stood there impatiently, waiting for Harry to answer. Niall usually wasn't like this, he was only a bit moody today. No one knew why, but they assumed they would let it slip today. Niall nodded agreeingly and turned his back to Harry. He walked over to the rest of the boys to plop down on the couch. "I'll sleep on the couch though, don't want to be a part of their sandwich." Liam said as he pointed at both Zayn and Niall. Zayn chuckled in response and managed to fist bump with Niall beside him. Niall couldn't help but let out a small cackle at Liam's cheeky comment. "Sure, I'll sleep on the floor or something." Harry said and shrugged his shoulders, it didn't matter where he slept anyway. They all nodded and Harry smiled in response. It was not a genuine smile though, he had his lips pursed as he lifted his eyebrows to show some sort of excitement. Which there was none of.

No, Harry didn't hate his friends. He just felt like tonight wasn't the night. Harry walked into his kitchen and quickly opened his fridge. Sadly, he was faced with only two cans of beer left. He frowned at the sight and noted that he should get more soon. He grabbed the cold beer cans and closed the fridge door with his hip, for the sake of entertainment. Harry knew that he could fit about three beer cans in one hand. He walked into the living room and placed the beverages on the small table in front of the boys. "Don't have more, sorry lads." Harry said and made a fake pout. He wasn't actually sorry though. He wanted to drink those two cans of beer himself, but now it was impossible without seeming rude.

Both Niall and Zayn went forward and reached for a can each. Liam simply shrugged his shoulders before muttering a quiet 'whatever'. Harry gave him an apologetic look before walking out of the living room. Harry would go insane if he stayed here, he did _not_  feel in the mood to hang out with the boys. He wanted to go and get some fresh air. "Wait where are you going?" Liam said, making Harry stop in his tracks. He shook his head disapprovingly and turned around to face Liam. Harry wanted to leave the apartment unnoticed, but Liam made it obvious that it wouldn't happen. Besides, this was Harry's goddamn flat. He's the host and he _should_  stay with them, but he doesn't want to and he's not going to. "Just going out to breath some fresh air, quite need it right now." Harry said with a blank expression on his face, not wanting Liam to bother him further. Liam nodded in response and turned his gaze at the tv in front of him, which the rest of the boys were already doing. Harry couldn't understand how they didn't get bored by the television, it was impossible for Harry to not get bored by it. He could not sit still and just watch other people doing things while he just sat down on his sofa. It was not something Harry could spend his whole night doing.

He sighed deeply as he walked over to where he had his outwear, slid his feet inside his boots and grabbed his nearest coat. He had plenty of coats if he had to be honest. It was a part of his fashion style I guess. Harry made sure to put on his coat once he entered his bedroom to go and grab his phone. He never knew if he needed it. He quickly snatched his phone off of his desk and checked his room one last time to see if everything looked fine before exiting. He shoved his phone in his pocket and lunged to the front door.

\----

Harry felt his feet tapping to the beat of the music in the bar. Harry had no idea how much he had walked before he reached this bar, but did not hesitate to walk inside when he realized his head was throbbing. He was kind of tired and he needed release. He knew that you shouldn't drink when you're tired, it makes you drunk more easily. But he was sure he could manage.

So there he was, ordering his fifth drink for the night as he'd just swallowed the remaining liquid in his last glass. His throat was burning and his stomach was churning from the strong alcohol he was recommended by the woman at the bar. Harry didn't even know what she had served him, but he accepted it anyway. He didn't know this bar at all, which meant he didn't have time to decide what he wanted. He just just wanted something strong, something that could drown his thoughts for a moment. Harry wasn't sad or anything, he just felt drained out of energy. He felt like not doing anything during all these five days without Louis. He knew that he shouldn't feel like this and that it was completely unnecessary to act like this without Louis. He just couldn't help but to give in and feel sorry about himself for not being with Louis at this exact moment. He misses his smell. His bright blue eyes piercing through his thick lashes. His soft lips against his. His tiny hands holding his. He misses him so much.

"There you go." The bartender said, placing Harry's drink in front of him. Harry smirked at her and snatched the drink off the table top. He chugged down the liquid but still felt his face scrunch up at the bitter taste. The drink was not tasty at all and he would most definitely not recommend it. Still he found himself asking the bartender for more. He looked around the bar to see his surroundings while he waited. He noticed a lot of people flirting, mostly grinding on each other to the beat of the music playing. It was making Harry frustrated that he was a lonely creeper, staring as everyone made out with their partners. Harry wanted that. He wanted Louis here.

_'Stop whining.'_

Harry rolled his eyes as his friend appeared in the picture. 'Stop talking' Harry thought. He didn't want his friend to bother while he had some kind of mental breakdown over Louis not being here. Damnit, he should be able to whine if he wanted to. A clinking sound was heard and Harry turned his attention back at the bartender. She had placed his two drinks in front of him and he thanked her by taking her hand and kissing her palm. She reacted by having her cheeks flushed and seemed exalted by the way Harry thanked her. Harry only wanted free drinks, so she shouldn't feel flattered at all actually. He didn't have eyes for her anyways. He started sipping his first drink, but quickly regretted it when the taste seemed even more bitter, grievous actually. "Fuck it." He mumbled as he went for his sixth drink of the night.

\-----

He was completely hammered. Harry was used to drinking many amounts of alcohol, but tonight was an exception. He had lost count on how many drinks he had downed his throat. Yeah, he drank _that_  much. No one was ordering any drinks anymore, everyone was drunk on each others affection. Which Harry wasn't. The bartender had even flirted with him a few times, but Harry simply ignored it. He didn't have time for some girl craving his attention, in fact he wanted Louis. His thoughts were flooded with 'LouisLouisLouisLouisLouis' within seconds. Harry looked back into the crowd of people and watched more warily. He wanted Louis to be here. He wanted him here right here, right now. He ached for Louis to be here.

_'I think I see him.'_

He jumped at the sound of his friend talking and was almost about to ask who, but mentally slapped himself for even thinking like that. 'Where?' Harry thought and looked urgently at the couple of heads in the mass of people in front of him. Harry felt his heart racing, he figured it was the alcohol speaking. Harry couldn't even see that clearly, I mean, he wasn't sure if he would be able to recognize Louis in this state.

_'3 o'clock'_

Harry turned his head to the right and spotted someone who seemed familiar. _Really_  familiar. Harry sprinted in commotion towards this one person he seemed to recognize so well. Sadly he couldn't see his face, it would only be more entertaining to surprise him from the back though. Wait how the fuck would Louis be able to get into a bar anyways? Isn't 18 the legal age to drink? Harry didn't quite understand but didn't let it bother him as he was just a few inches away from the boy. His choose of clothing seemed a bit odd and Harry was sure he had never seen Louis in those clothes before. Harry brushed it off though, he didn't want it to destroy the excitement he was currently experiencing. He closed the space between them by grasping Louis by his hips and pressing him against his chest. "I missed you." Harry slurred out as he nuzzled his face in Louis' neck. Louis seemed to have grown a few inches taller, that's weird. He also didn't smell like Harry remembered him, it was kind of strange really. Louis wasn't leaning into Harry, actually he was quite the opposite. He was very tense.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing with my girl?!" Someone shrieked. Harry turned around to be faced with this guy who was not that much taller than Harry, seemed kind of lanky actually. He looked at the infuriated man in front of him and clenched his jaw.

_'Did you just hear that? He fucking insulted Louis by referring him as a **female**. Are you just gonna let him do that?!' _

'No.' Harry thought and flared his nostrils with his eyes still glaring at the guy in front of him.

_'He even said that Louis was **his**. Is that acceptable Harry?' _

'No' Harry was almost boiling with rage at this point.

_'Well what are you doing?! Do something about it you bloody idiot!'_

So Harry did.

He looked at him one last time before letting his balled fist make contact with the guy's face. Harry had successfully hit him on the jaw and he smiled once he heard a cracking sound. He felt the adrenaline pump through his body once the guy landed on the floor, clearly affected by the punch he had just received. Harry proceeded to kick him harshly on his ribs, wanting this piece of shit to get what deserved. "Fuck you!" Harry screamed at the now limp body on the ground. The guy was not even reacting anymore and seemed almost lifeless. The amount of blood that was leaking on the ground didn't affect Harry at all.

Harry watched his surroundings and noticed that everyone had backed away from him. Everyone was now staring at Harry with horror in their eyes. Harry raised his arms up in the air and was almost about to scream 'What?!' but felt two strong hands around his wrists. He jerked at the touch and felt the grip around his wrists getting tighter. Harry turned his head to the side and was met with a buff security guard, probably carrying him out. That was when he panicked. "No! Louis is in here! Let me stay you assholes!" Harry screamed and tried getting out of the man's rough grip. He felt the security guard pushing him by his back, wanting him to walk forward. Harry did not do as he was indirectly demanded to do and turned around to see where Louis was.

There was no Louis to be seen. Louis wasn't there. The only thing he saw was a girl down on her knees, crying over the helpless body Harry had left on the ground. But Harry could've sworn Louis was there? What was this madness? Was his mind playing games with him? This was not funny. He wanted Louis.

Harry had not noticed that he had unconsciously let himself get carried out of the bar when he felt the cold and hard ground hit his bum. "Don't come back or we'll call the cops." The man said before leaving Harry alone on the pavement. "Fucking hell." He muttered as he looked down at his boots.

_'The guy got what he deserved.'_

"But I couldn't see Louis! He wasn't there!" Harry responded, not caring that people heard his thoughts out loud.

_'He was probably hiding from you, didn't you see what you just did to that guy?'_

"But you fucking told me to-"

_'I told you to do something, not punch him. Don't blame this on me'_

"But-"

_'Call Liam instead, tell him to pick you up.'_

Harry growled at his friend but decided that it was better to listen to what he had to say. He was already calling Liam a few moments later.

\----

"I can't believe that you could be this irresponsible, I mean really? Leave us in _your_  apartment while you go out and get drunk?" Liam said, not believing Harry had woken him up at 3 am for this shit. Harry didn't respond though, he just stared down at his lap. "This is unbelievable." Liam said in frustration. Luckily he had just parked his car outside Harry's apartment, so Harry didn't need to hear his nagging anymore. Harry sighed in relief but felt a big lump forming in his throat once he exited the car. He didn't bring much thought to it until he literally felt his mouth salivating, tasting an acidy bitter taste in his mouth. Harry gagged at the tickling feeling in his throat and vomited on the wet grass in front of him. Liam wanted to stay mad at Harry, but still found himself rubbing circles on Harry's back as he threw up. "Come on, let's go inside." Liam said once Harry was done puking. They walked over to Harry's apartment building with Liam's arms wrapped around Harry's hips, making sure he wouldn't trip by walking as unsteadily as he did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here you go a bit of an insight of Harry's relationship with his 'friend'. This is literally how most scenarios end up like when Harry would supposedly kill children, the voice in his head would make him angry enough to commit to the crime. I KNOW ITS HORRIBLE.
> 
> Oh and if you hadn't figured it out by yourself by now, Louis was never present in the bar. Harry had only hallucinated it and he had actually embraced a girl with short hair, which he thought was Louis. IM SORRY FOR LOUIS NOT BEING PRESENT IN THIS CHAPTER. I promise, he will be in the next one.
> 
> Now that all of that is cleared out, hope you enjoyed the chapter :) I literally spent days writing this bc writers block uGh. It's really annoying to be honest. There may be some misspellings or simply grammatical errors so I apologize. OH and thank you so much for 100 kudos already omg.
> 
> Don't forget to leave kudos or comments because they make me even more excited about updating :) 
> 
> ( Can we get over 5 comments on this chapter? I will probably consider updating this week if that happens aye c: )
> 
> Love you guys <3


	8. not an update IM SO SORRY

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IM REALLY SORRY IF YOU EXPECTED A NEW CHAPTER. PLEASE DONT KILL ME

I'm currently unable to finish chapter eight as I am very stressed lately. I'm really trying, but now that school started again, it's been harder to update. I usually update every week, but this time it has been almost two weeks since my last update. I'm going to try to finish chapter eight this week, you can slap me if I don't. No but seriously, I'm really trying to finish the chapter and actually make it good. I don't want to rush it because then I won't really be proud of my work. I want to make sure I'm in the right spirit when I continue writing it. Many things have been on my mind and it has distracted me from writing. Things like homework and the different subjects in school are examples of things on my mind. 

Don't be mad at me for taking long, please understand. I wanted to write this quickly to let you guys know what's currently happening. Not that I expect you to care about my personal life, just wanted to tell you the reason my update has been delayed. 

Love you guys :)

( I'll delete this after I've updated chapter eight c: )


	9. End of this story

I have decided to give up on this story. For a while I really tried finishing chapter eight, but slowly noticed that I was forgetting about how the original characters of my story were supposed to be. We all know Harry is this cold hearted psychopath with no ability to empathize with other, nor be particularly happy. He has a humongous fear of rejection, which really affects his way of thinking. He's also schizophrenic. Oh and right, he's a murder clown too! What a character eh? 

First of all, I simply despise my way of thinking when I first starting writing this story. I have rewritten sO many things in these chapters to at least be a little pleased with what I've done. I had to change many parts where Harry kept repeating 'mine' when he thought about Louis, which is completely wrong. Yes, I am aware that Harry's character is supposed to be a psychopath, but I just hate the fact that he objectifies Louis. That is not love and I can certainly not make it out to be in the end. Harry's way of seeing Louis is completely horrendous and I just want to slap myself for making it like this. So many of the things I've written are so cliché, I mean, why is Louis so special? If Harry really isn't capable of loving another person or simply empathizing with them, why the hell is Louis so goddamn special? I question my ways of thinking sometimes. 

And also, I really should've read on about Harry's illnesses and studied them before writing about them. It is wrong of me to assume how a certain illness is and continue to write about it in a very wrong way. Not every schizophrenic person is like this and I am very wrong for previously assuming that. It was also very stupid of me to use Harry's supposed illnesses as an excuse for his dumb actions. Punching someone and kicking them until they bleed, maybe even leading them to death, is not okay in any way. I'm pretty sure that has almost nothing to do with his illnesses, and has more to do with anger issues. 

Now that we've gotten Harry out of the way, let's start on with Louis' character. I have one thing to say about him and that is, blank. Louis' character is completely blank. He is literally just there for Harry to have a love interest. There is nothing likable about this character and he's just so plain. Nothing special about him other than his looks. Woah, I should get a pat on the back for that one. I managed to dehumanize the most wonderful person in the world by making him plain boring. We don't know why Harry likes him so much, other than the way Harry describes him as sassy. I mean yes, Louis was being sassy in one chapter, but only one. This story really lacks communication between them both and I'm just as confused as you are at how they manage to keep interest in each other.

I am also fully aware that the 'smut' was in fact rape. I'm disgusted by previously thinking this was in any way okay, because it's really not. Rape is not acceptable. I was actually planning on deleting the whole smut chapter, but let it be when I noticed the following chapters had in some way mentioned it. This seriously makes me want to punch myself in the face. As a person, who's fully against rape culture, actually wrote this and published it with no single problem makes me uGh. I am very mad at myself for writing this and I want to apologize to anyone who found this offensive or upsetting. 

This story is simply a mess and I've become very critical about it. Thank you to everyone who read it and in some way, enjoyed it! Hope you are okay with me realizing my own mistakes and not wanting to continue with this.


End file.
